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Writing Samples
Band 8

People living in the 21st century have a better quality of life than people who lived in previous centuries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #st #century #quality #life #centuries
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Although
 people from the 21st century are enjoying more convenience and choices brought by technology more than ever, the issue of whether modern human's quality of life exceeds our ancestors is certainly up for debate. In
this
 essay, I will explain why our lifestyles are better than our predecessors.
To begin
 with, in today's world, innovations are ubiquitous and have revolutionized how we live. Technology has played a vital role in enhancing our lives and making it more secure and dynamic. In the past, health problems like flu and severe injuries were more prevalent, and traditional agriculture techniques could not cater to the growing demand for food.
However
, with the advancements in various fields,
such
 as automation, digitalization, and medicine, we are now better equipped to deal with the challenges we face.
For instance
, automated cars, which only existed in science fiction, are now a reality. Digitalization has streamlined administrative processes, and vaccines have been developed to prevent deadly viruses like COVID-19.
Moreover
, We now have more leisure time to enjoy various forms of entertainment,
such
 as Netflix and 3D movies.
On the other hand
, the painful lessons from historical tragedies have taught us the significance of freedom and equality. Hundreds of years ago, women were banned from voting as citizens and seeking jobs to feed themselves.
Additionally
, African people were treated as products and enslaved people selling in auctions and suffered from segregation policies, which limited their right to education and work.
Although
 discrimination toward different genders and races still exists, we have indeed come a long way to reconstruct a world with less conflicts and more tolerance.
To sum up
,
while
 it is recognized that 21st-century humans still have new challenges ahead, we should still appreciate what our ancestors have done to facilitate a better world for us to live in.
Submitted by hadahada770930 on

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coherence cohesion
Be sure to consistently organize your paragraphs with clear topic sentences and supportive statements that maintain focus on the prompt.
task achievement
In your introduction, present a thesis statement that directly addresses the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement.
task achievement
When drawing on examples, ensure they are fully developed and directly linked to the argument you are making. While your examples mention areas such as digitalization and entertainment, a more in-depth explanation would strengthen your argument.
task achievement
Make sure your conclusion encapsulates your viewpoint effectively, summarizing your argument without introducing new ideas.
coherence cohesion
The use of cohesive devices to create a logical structure is commendable, but strive for variations in linking words to enhance flow and readability.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Technological advancements
  • Healthcare improvements
  • Economic growth
  • Social changes
  • Global connectivity
  • Standard of living
  • Life expectancy
  • Gender equality
  • Legal rights
  • Globalization
  • Cultural exchange
  • Access to information
  • Environmental concerns
  • Sustainable development
  • Stress levels
  • Quality of life
  • Medical progress
  • Job opportunities
  • Income disparity
  • Life satisfaction
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