Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

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Owing to the hectic lifestyle, many people are inclined to have junk

food

Use synonyms

rather than

have

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

healthy

food

Use synonyms

. A colossal amount of produced

food

Use synonyms

and beverages

consist

Correct subject-verb agreement

consists

show examples

of high levels of sugar which can

be triggered

Wrong verb form

trigger

show examples

peoples’ health.

This

Linking Words

can be mitigated by increasing the price of those items. I agree with the given phenomenon

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

since sugar is the main root of premature

death

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and many

diseases

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such

Linking Words

as cardiovascular

diseases

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

, the sugary industry’s revenue cannot be neglected. There are two major reasons why sweet products

Add a missing verb

are in

show examples

danger for people, namely to cause

diseases

Use synonyms

and premature

death

Use synonyms

Firstly

Linking Words

, there are many restaurants which sell numerous fast

food

Use synonyms

. Those consist of the high level of sugar and it directly

influence

Change the verb form

influences

show examples

peoples’ health.

For instance

Linking Words

, a recent research which was held by the

ministry

Capitalize word

Ministry

show examples

health

Capitalize word

Health

show examples

in Sri Lanka

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

revealed that approximately 78% of people

got

Verb problem

have

show examples

cardiovascular

diseases

Use synonyms

due to

Linking Words

their unhealthy

food

Use synonyms

patterns.

Secondly

Linking Words

, nowadays, there is a significant number of premature

Use synonyms

death

Fix the agreement mistake

deaths

show examples

. The main reason for

this

Linking Words

pressing concern is

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

high

Correct article usage

the high

show examples

level of sugary consumption.

For instance

Linking Words

according to

Linking Words

a study which has been published by medical authorities in the USA, especially

two-third

Correct your spelling

two-thirds

show examples

reason

Add an article

the reason

show examples

for premature

death

Use synonyms

was,

consumption

Correct article usage

the consumption

show examples

of sweet

food

Use synonyms

and beverages.

Therefore

Linking Words

it is clear that

Linking Words

sugary production should be alleviated.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, the sweet

food

Use synonyms

and drink manufacturing industry’s earnings cannot be neglected. Because it helps to boost the economy of the country. Another reason is, there are many employees and if they lose their jobs they cannot survive.

For example

Linking Words

, over 30% of individuals work in the

food

Use synonyms

industry in Sri Lanka.

Hence

Linking Words

elimination

Correct article usage

the elimination

show examples

sugary

Correct article usage

the sugary

show examples

industry from the country, will definitely

brings

Change the verb form

bring

show examples

about

socio-economic

Add an article

the socio-economic

a socio-economic

show examples

crisis. In conclusion, sugary

food

Use synonyms

and beverages

brings

Change the verb form

bring

show examples

about so many negative ramifications for society and by increasing its prices it can be alleviated. I agree with the given statement

due to

Linking Words

diseases

Use synonyms

and premature

death

Use synonyms

. It is recommended that the government should conduct public awareness programs to protect individuals.

nadee.documentFri Aug 25 2023

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

334 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

health problems
manufactured food and drink products
sugary products
excessive sugar consumption
discourage
promote
healthier choices
reduce
increased taxes
fund
health education
prevention programs

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Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree?

We have become a disposable society, preferring to buy new products rather than repair existing items. Why do you think this is? How can this trend be reversed?

In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why is this be the case? Do you think this a positive or negative situation?