in some countries, the average weight of people is increasing and their level of health and fitness are decreasing. what do you think are the causes of these problems, and what measure could be taken to solve them.

It is said that health is wealth.
This
proverb is true as several nations are losing their fitness because of the increasing average body weight of the community. In
such
countries, obesity has become a major problem causing serious issues to the well-being of common people. I
would
Wrong verb form
will
show examples
try to shed light on both causes and remedial measures to prevent
such
Correct article usage
a
show examples
mess in forthcoming paragraphs.
Firstly
, I will discuss the causes of
this
issue. In the recent past, it has been observed that the eating behaviour of people has changed a lot. People are now more addicted to junk food than ever before, which has adverse effects on their energy. Fast cuisine weakens the immune system of the frame and causes fatness. A survey conducted in America
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
shows that more than 36% of adults eat junk cooking on any given day.
Similarly
, less inclination toward physical workouts
such
as jogging or sports is
also
the main reason for getting fat.
For example
, the kids of
this
era prefer to play video games
instead
of taking part in games physically.
Moreover
, the daily tiring and busy routine
also
contribute
Correct subject-verb agreement
contributes
show examples
to fitness issues, because we have little time to spend on our body’s fitness.
In addition
to
this
, everyone is
also
involved in enhancing and improving his lifestyle, for
this
, he has to work from dawn to dusk. So, these are all factors which contribute to gaining body weight resulting in poor strength.
On the other hand
, let's discuss the measures that can we take to overcome
this
unhealthy situation. First of all, we should focus on our diet, which
would
Verb problem
should
show examples
be simple and healthy. If someone does not
take
Verb problem
eat
show examples
sound
Correct word choice
good
show examples
food, he does not enjoy a healthy life. Next to nourishment is exercise, we should
also
give some time to athletics
such
as running and playing sports games. So
overall
, these are some ways to mitigate the effects of fatness on the human body. In conclusion, to live a healthy and fit life one should focus on one's daily routines,
such
as eating habits and drilling capacity. If you are physically fit, you will enjoy a sound life.
Submitted by n.rezaei199170 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • obesity
  • sedentary
  • proliferation
  • nutritious
  • interventions
  • taxation
  • curb
  • promote
  • urban planning
  • community-based
  • convenience
  • dietary choices
  • sugary drinks
  • physical activity
  • nutritional education
What to do next:
Look at other essays: