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Band 6.5

The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and amount of time spent doing housework in households in one country between 1920 and 2019. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words

The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances and amount of time spent doing housework in households in one country between 1920 and 2019. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words
#show #changes #ownership #appliances #amount #time #housework #households #country #summarise #information #features #comparisons
This
 is an answer written by a candidate who achieved a Band 5.0 score.
This
charts
Change the determiner
chart
show examples
 shows about
percentage
 of
households
 with electrical appliances and
Number
Correct article usage
the Number
show examples
 of
hour
Change to a plural noun
hours
show examples
at
Change preposition
of
show examples
 housework per
week
, per household between 1920 and 2019. In the first chart washing machine.
Refrigerator
.
Vacuum
cleaner
Fix the agreement mistake
cleaners
show examples
 all rise from 1920 to 2019.
Refrigerator
Fix the agreement mistake
Refrigerators
show examples
 and
Vacuum
cleaner
Fix the agreement mistake
cleaners
show examples
increase
 faster than washing
machine
Fix the agreement mistake
machines
show examples
. In 1920,
Refrigerator
Correct article usage
the Refrigerator
show examples
just
Add a missing verb
had just
show examples
 zero
percentage
 of
households
 and
Refrigerator
Correct article usage
the Refrigerator
show examples
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 30
percentage
 of
households
, but in 2019 they all
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
100
Change preposition
by 100
show examples
percentage
 of
household
Fix the agreement mistake
households
show examples
. Washing machine is to
percantage
Correct your spelling
percentage
 of
households
 in 1920,
however
 in 2019 is just
increase
about
Change preposition
by about
show examples
 15
percantage
Correct your spelling
percentage
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
households
, and washing
mashine
Correct your spelling
machine
is
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
overed
Correct your spelling
covered
 by
Pefrigerator
Correct your spelling
Refrigerator
 and
Vacuum
cleaner
Fix the agreement mistake
cleaners
show examples
 in 1940 and 1960.
Vacuum
Add an article
The vacuum
A vacuum
show examples
 cleaner
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
overed
Correct your spelling
covered
 by Pefrigerator in 1942. In the second chart Houses per
week
 is 50
Number
 of hours per
week
, but it decline to 10
Number
 of hours per
week
 in 2019. Over
than
Replace the word
then
show examples
,
Correct article usage
the percentang
show examples
percentang
Correct your spelling
percentage
 of
households
 with
electical
Correct your spelling
electrical
appliance
Fix the agreement mistake
appliances
show examples
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
however
Number
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
per
week
decline
Wrong verb form
declined
show examples
 from 1920 to 2019.
Submitted by hamoudisayyah on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, households, number, week, refrigerator, vacuum, increase with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • household appliances
  • time-efficient
  • labour-saving devices
  • technological innovations
  • ownership rate
  • housework chores
  • domestic workload
  • automation
  • advancements
  • trend analysis
  • societal shifts
  • economic impact
  • durability
  • lifespan of appliances
  • maintenance
  • historical comparison
  • time allocation
  • drudgery reduction
  • energy consumption
  • disruption in trends
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