Today, people can work and live anywhere they want, because of the improvement of communication technology and transport. Do advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #work #improvement #communication #technology #transport #development

For the home

organization

, the

applicant

would return with a wealth of new knowledge and skills that would be invaluable to the

organization

's work. The

applicant

would have the opportunity to learn about different cultures and perspectives,

as well as

develop their cross-cultural skills.

This

would make them

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

more effective

communicator

Fix the agreement mistake

communicators

show examples

and

collaborator

Fix the agreement mistake

collaborators

show examples

Remove the comma

apply

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and would help them

Verb problem

apply

show examples

build stronger relationships with partners and clients from different cultures.

In addition

, the

applicant

would bring back new ideas and insights that could be used to improve the

organization

's work. The

applicant

would have the opportunity to see how other organizations are addressing similar challenges

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and would be able to apply these learnings to their own work.

This

could lead to new programs, initiatives, or products that would benefit the community. I believe that what he brings from

this

fellowship will have a very positive impact on the progress of the

organization

. The impact will certainly

last

for a long time.

Submitted by misstiasclassroom on Sat Aug 26 2023

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task response

The essay provided does not adequately address the IELTS question prompt about the advantages and disadvantages of people being able to work and live anywhere due to improvements in communication technology and transport. It instead seems to discuss the benefits an applicant may bring to an organization after returning from a fellowship, which is not relevant to the given topic. Make sure to directly respond to the question by discussing the specified advantages and disadvantages.

coherence cohesion

The essay lacks a clear introduction, logical development of ideas, and a conclusion. The structure is not evident, and there is no clear progression from one point to another. To improve, you must ensure that your essay contains an introduction that paraphrases the question, develops the main points in separate paragraphs with supporting details, and concludes with a summary of the points or your own opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

1 paragraphs

160 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Communication technology
Remote working
Economic growth
Cultural exchange
Urban congestion
Social inequalities
Transient populations
Globally homogeneous
Work-life separation
Connectivity
Erosion of local cultures

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Today, people can work and live anywhere they want, because of the improvement of communication technology and transport. Do advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Today more people are overweight than ever before. What in your opinion are the primary causes of this? What measures can be taken to overcome this epidemic?

Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. Do you agree or disagree?

Over consuming sugar is unhealthy. Some people think that governments should take responsibility to control it. Others think that individuals should take responsibility of sugar intake. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

13.Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In many countries paying for things, using mobile phone (cellphone apps) is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages.