IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

In marriages today, some argue that is the responsibility of both spouses to earn a living for the family. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#marriages #argue #responsibility #spouses
Nowadays, a few people think that
both
 husband and wife should be the shareholders of finance in the house. I believe that
this
 is a correct way of demonstrating marriage as a sacred union by sharing their duties with each other.
Firstly
, I will discuss the importance of funding in a house, and
secondly
, I will emphasize the importance of the participation of
both
 spouses from the financial perspective. In the constantly developing world, income plays a crucial role in the lives of people. It is a known fact that, as the number of income-earning individuals in the home rises, their living standards get much higher. A significant impact of
this
 case can be seen in households with a child or children. As the members of the family extend, the need for financial support increases which can be provided by
both
 parents. In order to make a better future for their child, each adult should take the burden on their back
instead
 of making it miserable for each other. To illustrate, in most Asian countries, only men provide living essentials for their families, which in turn results in a worse financial position for them and their children simultaneously.
Similarly
, work life is not a simple thing to process. Numerous issues are associated with
this
 specific topic
such
 as problems with bosses or colleagues, stressful conversations with clients, unsatisfactory performance results and so on. Leaving all these hardships on the shoulders of only one of the spouses brings nothing but damage to
both
 the mental and physical health of that individual.
This
 ,in turn, corresponds to the lack of time and ability that he or she can spend with kids.
For instance
, more than half of divorces in Indonesia are
due to
 the absence of a partner in his or her marriage.
To sum up
, I strongly opine that, the participation of
both
 partners is necessary in the income-earning process for the household, owing to the fact that it eases life conditions for each of them.
Submitted by samid.mustafayev20 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: