IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Topic: it is better for students to study from home rather than go to school. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#topic #students #study #home #school
A number of people all over the world believe that are children unnecessary to learn at educational centres
while
 others think studying at school can bring many advantages.
However
, individuals can not deny an improvement in technology that happens make writer must agree with the former statement and will show more details in the next paragraph. On the one hand, there is a sharp increase in high-tech devices which can become an upward trend in the future. Many undergraduates who enrol in university without coming directly to
this
 play can get a lot of offers in terms.
Moreover
, there is a boost per cent of postgraduate learning distance and it is convenient for recording lectures.
Besides
, an investigation at the shelter might economic money and time.
For example
, the majority of parents in the US pay educators to teach their children at home,
This
 problem is not too strange but it
also
 brings great benefits to their children's education. Moving to another view gaining knowledge at school can help tutors communicate with people better,
however
, school violence is an extremely common problem, Debates have taken place on social forums and solutions are
also
 offered, but
this
 has not shown any signs of stopping.
In particular
, students who have been abused by their peers have had psychological and physical problems, which are the cause of their academic decline and lead to withdrawal from society. All in all, learning at lodgings or at hospice both has certain benefits and disadvantages,
,
Change the punctuation
apply
show examples
nonetheless
 the writer encourages learning at home because it brings certain benefits without having to worry about problems with violent subjects.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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