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Band 7

The use of mobile phone is as antisocial as smoking. Smoking is banned in certain places so mobile phone should be banned like smoking. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#phone #places
The
use
 of mobile
phones
 is globalised. Some
people
 believe that cell
phones
 are as antisocial as smoking.
Therefore
, it should be banned like smoking. I strongly disagree that using
phones
 should be banned,
this
 essay will discuss in detail the reasons why. In the first ,place the
use
 of mobile
phones
 can be considered antisocial,
due to
 the
fact
 that nowadays, the majority of
people
 walk by the side road, or inside the mall and are not paying attention to what's in front of them but rather they are looking down on their cellphones sometimes with their headphones over their head too.
Moreover
, when meeting with family or friends,
people
 tend to be always looking at their
phones
 and not focusing on the
people
 who are talking with them.
On the other hand
, we can't deny the
fact
 that the
use
 of a hand phone is critical in our daily lives.
Phones
 can make our lives easier. It made
people
 efficient. We can
use
 it to contact someone if need to, it makes communication easier and faster ,
Furthermore
Add a comma
,Furthermore
show examples
phones
 can
also
 be used for various things
such
 as; reading, social media, and news updates. Everything is possible with a single handphone because it offers a plethora of information.
To conclude
, using
phones
 can be somewhat categorised as antisocial
due to
 the
fact
 that
people
 are more focused on their gadgets than talking to
people
, but we can't object to the
fact
 that
phones
 are no longer an option but a necessity.
Submitted by Anneya on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • antisocial
  • social interactions
  • negative impacts
  • banning
  • regulated
  • completely banned
  • education
  • awareness campaigns
  • responsible
  • mobile phone use
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