Some people think that one sould plan detailed activities for their leisure time, while others disagree with this view. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

It is considered by many that there should be a structured layout of how free

time

Use synonyms

can be spent,

while

Linking Words

others say that it should be unorganised.

While

Linking Words

the tasks done in free

time

Use synonyms

can lead to passion, I believe that an individual should enjoy the duration without thinking much about it. On the one hand, work done in a free hour can turn into a passion.

In addition

Linking Words

, a systematic approach can lead to passion towards a successful career

as well as

Linking Words

holistic

Correct article usage

the holistic

show examples

development of a person.

For example

Linking Words

, many household women in Nepal, who engaged themselves in various activities like gardening and knitting, have successfully established YouTube channels with a sufficient number of subscribers.

Moreover

Linking Words

, have become entrepreneurs.

Therefore

Linking Words

, utilisation of

leisure

Use synonyms

time

Use synonyms

can play a significant role in uplifting the standard of living.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, the working population are often stressed by the amount of work pressure.

This

Linking Words

requires them to have some personal moments to rejuvenate and calm their mind and

soul

Fix the agreement mistake

souls

show examples

As a result

Linking Words

, the individual might prefer watching TV or

earning

Verb problem

making

show examples

memories with family members. A recent survey on a social media platform

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

suggests that the majority of people prefer watching Netflix in their

leisure

Use synonyms

time

Use synonyms

Hence

Linking Words

, it is important to feel fresh by taking some breaks in our own way after an immense load of work. In conclusion,

leisure

Use synonyms

time

Use synonyms

is meant to refresh a person.

Therefore

Linking Words

it is clear that

Linking Words

the idea of having a methodical plan for

leisure

Use synonyms

activities is not necessary.

Although

Linking Words

a structured layout of tasks to achieve in free

time

Use synonyms

contributes toward personal growth, in my opinion, a person deserves to spend the

point

Check wording

time

show examples

in their own desired manner

joginderkour524

Aug 29, 2023

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planning

Plan two clear views. Put each view in its own part with a simple reason.

development

Add a clear link between each idea and life, so ideas feel tied to real life.

language

Fix grammar errors and clean the sentence parts. Use subjects in every sentence.

style

Use short, clean lines and many full stops to make the piece easier to read.

structure

The essay tries to talk about both sides of the issue.

content

There is a clear idea of what leisure can do for life.

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

281 words

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Some people think that one sould plan detailed activities for their leisure time, while others disagree with this view. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

A rise in the standard of living in a country often only seems to benefit cities rather than rural areas. What problems can this cause? How might these problems be reduced?

Explain some of the ways in which humans are damaging the environment. What can the governments do to address these problems? What can individual people do?

Torism plays an important role in the modern world. It considered as the major source of income. Likewise several disadvantages too. In these essay we discuss about the posyive and negative effect of tourism.