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Band 4

IT IS BETTER FOR CHILDREN TO STUDY FROM HOME RATHER THAN GOING TO SCHOOL. DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE WITH THIS STATEMENT ?

#children #study #home #school
Some individuals believe that studying from home is better than attending
school
 directly for
children
 . From my perspective , some say it is better to study at home
due to
its
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the
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 flexibility of modern technology
while
 I completely disagree with
this
 statement because going to
school
 provides
students
more
Change preposition
with more
show examples
 social
skills
 and increases student’s concentration
To begin
 , the main reason for
this
 statement is that
students
 can develop more communication
skills
 and become confident
due to
 going to
Correct article usage
an educationcal
show examples
educationcal
Correct your spelling
educational
 institution . By way of
explaination
Correct your spelling
explanation
,
school
 is a miniature society where
children
 can connect with
orthers
Correct your spelling
others
,
gain
Correct word choice
and gain
show examples
 many soft
skills
 and confidence.
For instance
 , after covid’s social distancing
students
 in Viet Nam became more sensitive
due to
 their lack of
school
 approach . Another salient point is that online lectures make
children
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
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less concentrated owing to the attraction to entertainment apps when they connect to the internet.
In addition
 , there is now social media is the most attractive to teenagers
as
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because of
show examples
 its suitable content .
There fore
Correct your spelling
Therefore
show examples
, many
students
 were giving their
direction
Fix the agreement mistake
directions
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 on entertainment apps
while
teacher
Add an article
the teacher
show examples
 was teaching . As a
results
Correct the article-noun agreement
result
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, it is difficult for
children
 to have
a
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apply
show examples
complete progress of study when they
are not actually learn
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are not actually learning
show examples
. In conclusion , studying
to
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at
show examples
school
Add an article
the school
show examples
 directly to gain knowledge is better in
advance
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advancing
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 student’s social
skills
 .
In particular
 , attending
school
 provides
children
Add the preposition
with an
show examples
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 ability
of concentrated
Change preposition
to concentrate
show examples
thinking
Change preposition
on thinking
show examples
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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