Some people think that keeping pets is good for children while others think it is dangerous and unhealthy. Which opinion do you agree with? Discuss both options and give examples
It has been stated that it is beneficial for kids to be around
pets
however
, the opposite opinion believes that animals
can be unsafe for children. I personally agree with the second argument and in the following, I will delineate both views.
Keeping pets
can cause medical issues and pets
also
need training to obey the owner. There are many diseases that can be transferred from animals
to humans and therefore
a sick one can cause a child to have health problems even if the baby does not touch the body of the pet. For instance
, I had a serious flu because of my sick chickens. More important than sickness, pets
can create a harmful situation if the owner does not allocate enough time for education. Dogs especially need more attention than other animals
and if they do not receive it they become violent and as a result
, they may bite anyone around them. Consequently
, children around them will be in critical danger. For example
, I have read in a daily newspaper that the bite of a dog killed a 6-year-old girl when she was trying to play with her.
On the contrary
, some people believe that having animals
in the house can be educational and pets
can also
be considered a guardian too. When young adults see living creatures near them, they learn much more information compared to their pictures in books, since they can touch and feel them using their senses of eyes, ears and hands. In this
situation, the educational purpose will be boosted dramatically. For example
, I have learnt about various fishes after I bought an aquarium for myself. Moreover
, some types of pets
can play the guardian role since they have a protection instinct and therefore
if the kid is in danger, they are going to inform others with their acts. For example
, the dog will bark if he/she sees that the baby is doing a dangerous activity.
In conclusion, although
keeping pets
can have educational goals and they can also
be considered a means of protection, their health problems may harm children and their uncontrolled behaviours towards kids may cause critical violations.Submitted by zbafshar92 on
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coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is fairly good, but some improvements can be made to enhance the coherence of the arguments.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-presented, providing a clear overview of the essay's content.
coherence cohesion
The main points are supported with relevant examples, but further elaboration and depth in explanation would enhance the coherence of the essay.
task achievement
The response addresses the task but lacks depth and thorough analysis of both perspectives. More detailed development of ideas and balanced discussion is needed to fulfill the task requirements.
task achievement
The essay provides a clear response to the prompt with relevant examples, but the ideas could be further developed and balanced to provide a more comprehensive discussion of both perspectives.
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