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Band 5.5

In some culture, children are being told that they can achieve anything if they work hard.What are advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

#culture #children #work #message
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Working hard is loudly encouraged ever since as from an early age so when they grow up, they can acquire things they want. Like a coin, it has two sides that might be positive or negative. When it comes to their
children
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, parents are willing to spend money to make their
children
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 the most shining in the class by taking courses after school time. Parents
also
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not
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do not
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 forget to give several motivational phrases and old sayings about hard work never betraying.
Therefore
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, these make the
children
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 eager to work more diligently and spur them to succeed in life. Those
children
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 who are used to working hard, later in life, are more resistant to any obstacles because they are trained to get used to them. So when they grow up, they are more resilient and less stressed.
On the other hand
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, plenty of
children
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 are pushed too hard to join many classes in a short amount of time. It really gives
children
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 a lot of burnout. Little they did know, that burnout brings stress and it emerges a feeling of reluctance.
Children
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 who can not resist stress
,
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apply
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 will soon feel the urge to get out of
this
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 periodic learning and start to leave all behind. All they want now is just playing around to get the burnout away.
Consequently
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, it's hard to bring
children
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 back to their track of learning diligently. It affects a lot with the psychology of kids. Turns out they are more lazy and will be more vulnerable to feelings of stress.
To sum up
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, the advantages of working hard outweigh the disadvantages. An old saying says, "Hold a little more, to gain some more".
Submitted by matcha on

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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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