Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#children #hours #smartphones #case #development

In these modern days, there is a behaviour of spending time using a

smartphone

among several children. Actually,

this

situation can lead to both positive and negative development depending on how to face

this

case.

However

, from my point of view, it is a negative development that can have several consequences and impacts. In

this

particular essay,

this

statement will be discussed.

To begin

with, the advancement of technology cannot be avoided in people's life, nowadays.

Smartphones

are one of the innovations that can reach all generations, including young ages.

Smartphones

have the ability to give a lot of entertainment through applications installed inside the

smartphone

, for ,example online games (Mobile Legend, PUBG), movie streaming (Netflix, Youtube), and social media (Instagram, Facebook). The entertainment on the

smartphone

can make young ages forget about the time when they were playing with a

smartphone

Therefore

, the use of

smartphones

among teenagers needs to have more attention from adults,

such

as giving a rule of duration when they are playing a

smartphone

. It is because

smartphones

have the capacity to affect them in the aspects of health, and social skills.

For example

, as the health aspect, when youngster spends hours on their

smartphones

every day, they will experience an illness in their eyes that lead to them using glasses.

In addition

, the long duration of kids playing with a

smartphone

can affect their lack of social skills since they are mostly spending their time on the

smartphone

instead

of making a connection to people in real life. To summarize, the phenomenon of spending hours every day on the

smartphone

among some children is caused by the entertainment that

smartphones

provide.

However

smartphones

can affect children in the aspect of eye illness and lack of social skills.

Therefore

, I believe wholeheartedly that

this

case is a negative development.

Submitted by zakiyaartanti19 on Fri Sep 01 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

304 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

smartphones
usage
technology
accessibility
convenience
entertainment
gaming
social media
communication
educational resources
addiction
dependence
negative effects
physical health
mental health

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Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Fully explain your ideas

The government should reduce the amount of money spent on local environmental problems and instead increase funding into urgent and more threatening issues such as global warming. To what extent do you agree

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation,such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money.Other argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both views and give opinions

In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

In many countries, international tourism has become an important source of income. However, it also has negative effects. Do the benefits of international tourism outweigh the disadvantages?