The charts below show the results of a survey on happiness ratings for married and unmarried people in the US, and the effect of children on the overall ratings of married couples

The charts below show the results of a survey on

happiness ratings for married and unmarried

people in the US, and the effect of children on the

overall ratings of married couples
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The given charts represent the result of a survey on satisfaction levels for married and unmarried
people
Use synonyms
in the US, and the effect of
children
Use synonyms
on the
overall
Linking Words
ratings of married couples.
Overall
Linking Words
, married couples’ percentages are
reveals
Verb problem
apply
show examples
almost similar in every
age
Use synonyms
category,
while
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
those of unmarried
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
show examples
a higher percentage in the older ages;
however
Linking Words
, the rest
shares
Fix the agreement mistake
share
show examples
almost similar numbers.
According to
Linking Words
the first chart, the proportions of joyful married
people
Use synonyms
in four various
age
Use synonyms
groups are over 40%, and married
people
Use synonyms
who are in
age
Use synonyms
18-29 are the happiest at 45%. Meanwhile, the happiness percentages of unmarried
people
Use synonyms
are clearly lower than
another one
Fix the agreement mistake
other ones
show examples
at slightly over 20%, but single
people
Use synonyms
who are over 65 have a noticeable gap with other
age
Use synonyms
groups at almost 35%.
Linking Words
Further more
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
show examples
, the second bar chart shows that having
children
Use synonyms
does not
give
Verb problem
have
show examples
a significant effect
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
happiness levels. The highest percentage of satisfaction by married
people
Use synonyms
with
children
Use synonyms
under 18 is 44%.
However
Linking Words
, slightly fewer (43%) of married
people
Use synonyms
are satisfied with their life. Meanwhile, 41%
those
Change preposition
of those
show examples
with
children
Use synonyms
in teenagers and above
age
Use synonyms
groups are happy.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, overall".
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, children, age with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: