IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Universities should allocate the same amount of money to their sport activities as they allocate to their libraries. Do you agree or disagree?

#universities #amount #money #sport #activities #libraries
In today's society, there is a growing debate about whether
teenagers
 should be mandated to engage in unpaid
community
work
 during their free time.
While
this
 idea has its merits, I believe that
such
 a requirement should not be enforced, and
teenagers
 should have the choice to participate voluntarily.
Firstly
, it is crucial to recognize the potential benefits of
teenagers
 engaging in
community
service
. It can foster a sense of responsibility and empathy in them, as they become more aware of the needs and challenges faced by their local communities.
Furthermore
,
community
work
 can provide
teenagers
 with an opportunity to develop practical skills and enhance their personal growth, which may be
otherwise
 limited within the confines of a classroom.
However
, it is equally important to consider the potential drawbacks of making unpaid
community
work
 mandatory.
Firstly
,
teenagers
 already face a significant amount of academic and extracurricular pressures, and adding another compulsory activity to their schedules could lead to burnout and reduced academic performance.
Additionally
, forcing
teenagers
 to volunteer may result in insincere or resentful participation, which can undermine the very goals of
community
service
 – promoting empathy and a sense of civic duty.
Instead
 of mandating
community
work
, society should focus on encouraging and facilitating voluntary involvement. Schools and communities can provide information about the benefits of
community
service
 and offer incentives,
such
 as recognition or scholarships, to motivate
teenagers
 to participate willingly.
This
 approach allows
teenagers
 to make a genuine choice and embrace the values of
community
service
 at their own pace. In conclusion,
while
 there are undeniable advantages to
teenagers
 engaging in unpaid
community
work
, making it mandatory may have negative consequences. A better approach is to inspire and support
teenagers
 in their voluntary efforts, allowing them to experience the benefits of
community
service
while
 preserving their autonomy and well-being.
Submitted by hoaan2409 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: