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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people say that television is useful for education, while others say it is useful only for entertainment. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Controversial
Correct article usage
A controversial
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 argument is being maintained
whether
Change preposition
about whether
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television
Use synonyms
 can us for studies or leisure activities by the supporters, who
obligated
Add a missing verb
are obligated
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 to the ach parties.
However
Linking Words
, I guess that TV is
a
Change the article
an
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 essential tool for education and
this
Linking Words
 essay will elaborate profoundly to justify my opinion. On
one
Correct article usage
the one
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hand
Add a comma
,hand
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 educational advantages are considerably increased
of
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apply
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the
television
Use synonyms
on
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apply
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present days.
This
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 gadget
is
Change the verb form
is used
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use
Use synonyms
 by many teachers to clarify their lessons in most
class rooms
Correct your spelling
classrooms
show examples
due to
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 convenience to
undestand
Correct your spelling
understand
 because it is ideal to
use
Use synonyms
visual
Fix the agreement mistake
visuals
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 to teach students in
easy
Add an article
an easy
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 way
as well as
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 some particular programmes, which broadcast based on
school
Correct article usage
the school
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 curriculum
also
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 extra support to enhance their knowledge.
For instance
Linking Words
, most schools in Sri Lanka
use
Use synonyms
 TVs in their
class room
Correct your spelling
classroom
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use
Use synonyms
vedios
Correct your spelling
videos
 and educational programmes, which
increase
Correct subject-verb agreement
increases
show examples
 the perception of the children.
Therefore
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, there are many advantages
in
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to
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 using
television
Use synonyms
 for teaching.
On the other hand
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, a few
drowbacks
Correct your spelling
drawbacks
also
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along with
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this
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 tool,
such
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 as pupils are addicted to
watch
Change the verb form
watching
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television
Use synonyms
 as it contains more
colorful
Change the spelling
colourful
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 and
mesmerized
Wrong verb form
mesmerising
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 segments.
In addition
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, using visual media as
teaching
Add an article
a teaching
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 method
for
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in
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long
Correct article usage
the long
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 run may cause
loss
Correct article usage
a loss
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 of imagination
of
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in
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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teenagers. If juveniles did not utilize equipment would be able to think and create the lesson in their mind which
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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accelerated the brain function.
For instance
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,
watchin
Correct your spelling
watching
watchin'
television
Use synonyms
was
Verb problem
has
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 brought adverse effect
to
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on
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 one of my
collegue
Correct your spelling
colleague
colleagues
 being unable to solve
mathematic
Replace the word
mathematical
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 calculations for his examination
due to
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the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
exessive
Correct your spelling
excessive
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 usage
for
Change preposition
of
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 maths subject. Though unlimited usage might
occur
Verb problem
have
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negative
Correct article usage
a negative
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 impact, could be prevented by implementing necessary
precausions
Correct your spelling
precautions
.
To conclude
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,
although
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 there are a few advantages,
such
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 as
Replace the word
decreased
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decrease
Wrong verb form
decreased
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 imagination might be
Wrong verb form
alleviated
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alleviate
Wrong verb form
alleviated
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 by applying proper measures,
valuble
Correct your spelling
valuable
 positive development
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 highly effective
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in
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to
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in
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 the success of the students, which is able to be used as a supportive tool for the education field.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • educational programs
  • informative documentaries
  • interactive learning
  • entertaining content
  • reality shows
  • cartoons
  • intellectual development
  • parental guidance
  • screen time
  • creative thinking
  • educational potential
What to do next:
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