Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree?

#salary #job #satisfaction

In the contemporary era, lucrative

salary

packages attract people's attention, which is why,

number

Correct article usage

a number

show examples

of individuals deem that

job

satisfaction

is less significant than

salary

. I wholeheartedly disagree with

this

ideology because having

satisfactory

Add an article

a satisfactory

show examples

job

provides psychological

satisfaction

and

opportunity

Correct article usage

the opportunity

show examples

to spend more time with family. The primary factor is that

masses

Correct article usage

the masses

show examples

can obtain more mental

satisfaction

by doing jobs with less

salary

, which cannot be acquired by doing jobs with high

salary

package

Fix the agreement mistake

packages

show examples

. When they feel relaxed, they might be more productive and try to accomplish their task more effectively and efficiently.

Consequently

, it might affect their

job

performance positively with more career growth opportunities.

For instance

, teaching jobs in India in private schools may not offer big

salary

packages to its employees,

however

, it allows employees not to work for long hours,

along with

extra recreational leave for personal refreshment, which may overpower the influence of big

salary

Moreover

, individuals get more quality time to spend with their families.

In other words

, continuing careers in occupations with less pay

give

Correct subject-verb agreement

gives

show examples

them more time to spend

Change preposition

with

show examples

their families. Even though

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

they may not enjoy

much

Change the quantifier

many

show examples

financial benefits from their bosses or the company they work for,

however

, they may experience

better

Correct article usage

a better

show examples

family life. To exemplify, IBM company is one of

best

Correct article usage

the best

show examples

multinational companies, which offers lucrative

salary

packages with extra benefits to its employees, but at the cost of sacrificing personal

lives

Fix the agreement mistake

life

show examples

comforts

such

as personal leaves, public holidays leave and the pay for missing other important events. In conclusion, I concur that

job

satisfaction

is more important than getting

big

Add an article

a big

show examples

salary

, as it offers personal

wellbeing

Correct your spelling

well-being

show examples

and more chances to catch up with near and dear ones.

Submitted by meghnabawa91 on Sat Sep 02 2023

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

279 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

remuneration
financial security
motivation
luxuries
material possessions
fulfillment
work-life balance
stress levels
mental well-being
job security

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Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree?

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Please evaluate my writing task based on IELTS band descriptors for writing task 2. During your evaluation, please act as a 20-year-old-experienced IELTS examiner

Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment; only governments and large companies can make a difference. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.