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Writing Samples
Band 5

in many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. to what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #people #population #governments #society
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Nowadays, there is an increasing number of senior citizens in many parts of the world.
This
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 might be
due to
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 the appropriate health promotion strategies, improved treatments for diseases, and better understanding among
people
Use synonyms
 about how to live healthy lifestyles. Some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that
increased
Correct article usage
an increased
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 number of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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elderly can benefit
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society,
while
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 others argue that the phenomenon creates more problems for
the
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apply
show examples
governments. I am one of those who believe in the latter and
i
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I
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 will support
this
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 idea with some evidence in
this
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 following essay. It is argued by some individuals that
aging
Correct article usage
the aging
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population
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 contributes to the development of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
societies in several ways.
For example
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, older
people
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 have experienced more in their careers and lives, so they are more likely to perform more strategically and carefully in their jobs than their younger
counterpart
Fix the agreement mistake
counterparts
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.
Moreover
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,
they
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
 seniors can teach the young about their
expertises
Correct your spelling
expertise
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.
The societies
Correct article usage
Societies
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 with more older
people
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 are
also
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 less likely to have accidents related to dangerous behaviours,
for example
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, driving too fast on the streets, excessive alcohol consumption, and drug abuse, which are seen more frequently in areas with younger generation.
On the other hand
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, the disadvantages of
Correct article usage
an aging
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aging
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ageing
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 society seem to outweigh the previously mentioned benefits.
This
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 is seen in the rising trend of hospitalizations in areas with more older
people
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,
as well as
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 the increased prevalence of chronic diseases. When there are
less
Correct quantifier usage
fewer
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 younger
people
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 to take care of the elders, they are more likely to have accidents including falls and fractures. Poorer memory and cognition
also
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 make the old more prone to getting lost or harmed by those who want to take advantage of them. Mental health among the elders
also
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 becomes a great concern for the seniors who live alone.
Furthermore
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,
this
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population
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 might be too old to
used
Wrong verb form
use
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 labour, or their focus might not be clear and quick enough to work in monetary or major businesses. In conclusion,
Correct article usage
the aging
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aging
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ageing
show examples
population
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 is becoming prevalent in many countries.
This
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 leads to more risks than benefits to
the
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apply
show examples
society so the government should have
maneuvers
Change the spelling
manoeuvres
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 to protect
this
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population
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 and ensure their living conditions are safe and appropriate. Meanwhile, steps should be taken to
reinforce
Verb problem
encourage
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 to have more children in these societies and the authorities should provide proper living conditions for
people
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 of all age groups.
Submitted by mookdarat.s on

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Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • ageing population
  • benefits
  • disadvantages
  • advantages
  • experience
  • knowledge
  • contribution
  • economy
  • society
  • healthcare
  • youth employment
  • community
  • intergenerational support
  • volunteerism
  • mentorship
  • increased demand
  • pension costs
  • social welfare systems
  • workforce
  • productivity
  • intergenerational conflict
  • technological adaptability
  • dependency
  • effective
  • skill development
  • employment opportunities
  • intergenerational solidarity
  • communication
  • lifelong learning
  • technological literacy
  • age-friendly
  • social policies
  • infrastructure
What to do next:
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