IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

People living in 21st century generally have better quality of lives than people born in earlier centuries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There has been a lot of development that has been taken in the past couple of years, both in terms of technology
as well as
Linking Words
 the
lifestyle
Use synonyms
 of the people. Some people state there is quality of
life
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 others oppose it. In my point of view, these developments
has
Change the verb form
have
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 drastically changed the quality
our
Change preposition
of our
show examples
 lives.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, the advancement in technology, machinery and
lifestyle
Use synonyms
 has always been on the run and changes are required to be updated in
life
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
development
Fix the agreement mistake
developments
show examples
 in applications and electronic gadgets have simplified our lives, which solves our problems in just a click. Apart from that there has been a lot of globalization in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
recent years, resulting in higher income and
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
 standard of living.
For instance
Linking Words
,
microwave
Correct article usage
the microwave
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 helps in reheating
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
food within
couple
Change the article
a couple
show examples
 of minutes and is
time saving
Add a hyphen
time-saving
show examples
.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, many other individuals believe that these changes have hampered
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
physical movement and
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
also
Linking Words
 a reason for obesity.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the easy and ready-made food available is causing many health issues.
Additionally
Linking Words
, competitiveness for
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
 standard of
lifestyle
Use synonyms
 has developed jealousy and enemyship among
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fellow co-workers.The employees tend to spend more hours working and share less family time.
According to
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 recent survey taken at Amazon, 45% of the employees work on holidays with a view to
earn
Change the verb form
earning
show examples
 more. To sum it up, I believe both men and women are working in order to secure more financial stability and improved standards of
life
Use synonyms
. The change in the
lifestyle
Use synonyms
 pattern of individuals
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 exceptionally replaced the olden norms of
life
Use synonyms
.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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