Some people think that young people should spend free time with families instead of outside entertainment, others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion

The question of whether teenagers should spend more time with their household has sparked heated debate. Some claim that the method builds a strong relationship with each other,
whereas
others argue that staying outside might be more advantageous since they can have more friends or events, making their lives more colourful. In the essay, I will elucidate both perspectives in more detail and offer my personal viewpoints.
To begin
with, many parents and educators emphasize that staying with one’s family can be essential for children since the elders can deliver their life experiences and provide educational support.
For instance
, it is evident that grandparents with a speciality in a certain field can share related knowledge and give academic instruction to their grandchildren.
Furthermore
,
this
way, young individuals can construct a close relationship with their family members that forms a strong bond and cohesion. After all, they are the most precious people for any person in the world.
On the other hand
, staying outside for recreational events enhances connection with friends and other opportunities.
For example
, playing basketball provides an excellent platform that fosters teamwork and leadership.
Moreover
, friendships built in the young stages generally provide several bits of help when kids become adults. Another obvious case is that many are introduced by their childhood friends to the company they always wanted.
Therefore
, outside entertainment is equally important. In conclusion, the two statements have valid grounds, a middle approach might be more beneficial to youngsters since it combines advantages together. Obviously, loved ones and fellows are both valuable in one’s life,
as a result
, citizens should balance the time spent on these significant others.
Submitted by aaron.ten.tw on

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task response
Ensure that the essay directly addresses the prompt and discusses both views in a balanced manner.
coherence cohesion
Organize the ideas and arguments coherently with logical sequence and clear connection between sentences and paragraphs.
lexical resource
Use a wide range of vocabulary appropriately and accurately to express ideas.
grammatical range
Demonstrate a variety of sentence structures and ensure grammatical accuracy.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • bond
  • relationship
  • communication
  • experience
  • learn
  • opportunity
  • exposure
  • culture
  • perspective
  • development
  • interest
  • skill
  • socialize
  • peer
  • broaden
  • horizon
  • opinion
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