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Band 4.5

Many people feel that going to the gym is the best way to stay fit . Others think there are more effective methods. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

#people #gym #methods
There is an argument
that
Change preposition
about
show examples
 whether a fitness
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 is a good place to stay healthy
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 not. I contend that it is better for
gymers
Correct your spelling
gamers
 to go to the gyms
instead
 of
stay
Wrong verb form
staying
show examples
 and
work
Wrong verb form
working
show examples
 out at home
although
 some people
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
 that
gym
Correct article usage
the gym
show examples
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
is wasting
Wrong verb form
waste
show examples
 money and time. It is obvious that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
participating
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
gym
 will bring lots of benefits. It is because of their modern services and facilities in the area where we take exercise .
For instance
,
join
Wrong verb form
joining
show examples
 a
gym
 club can help us to hire a professional physical trainer, who can help us not only in training but
also
 give us the diet to follow.
As a consequence
, the attendance will have a suitable plan and an achievement to follow.
Therefore
, people who attend
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the training schedule will become
heathier
Correct your spelling
healthier
show examples
 faster than those who do not.
Despite the
Change preposition
The
show examples
 majority of people believe that
gym
Correct article usage
the gym
show examples
 is the best way to help them to have the perfect body. There are enough facilities for them at the centre and each person will have their own guidance.They just need to come to the sports
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 and do their work. But it seems like not suitable for those who do not like heavy activities.
This
 is because
this
 method requires them to spend time and a huge amount of money to have the result that they want. Taking everything into account, I believe that
nation
Correct article usage
the nation
show examples
 should try new things every day without judgment. Other solutions are good because of their convenience and suitability for some society

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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