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Band 4.5

Many feel that going to the gym is the best way to stay fit. Others think there are more effective methods. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

#gym #methods
A section of society prefers going to the
gym
 establishment to stay healthy
due to
many
Correct article usage
the many
show examples
 benefits of it, But
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 minority of people disagree with it and argue that it has an area of ways to keep fit. To my mind, I agree with the first statement and will explain the causes
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 my own view.
To begin
 with, the
gym
 class or yoga class has a cluster of professional teachers who can help you
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the way
that is
 most effective.
For instance
, with the same activity, when you do it at home with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
medias
Correct your spelling
media
show examples
, you can do it
correct
Change the word
correctly
show examples
 but not really certain and ensure that it
is not have
Change the verb form
does not have
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 a bad
affect
Replace the word
effect
show examples
to
Change preposition
on
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our
Correct pronoun usage
your
show examples
health
.
Besides
 that,
teacher
Add an article
a teacher
the teacher
show examples
 who is the person that
more
Add a missing verb
is more
show examples
 trustful to get an instruction about what you should eat or not rather than the Internet on the ground that diet
play
Change the verb form
plays
show examples
 an essential role to our
health
 and lives. To be honest, eating is the act that we can control correctly to eat food that we need to eat. In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other terms, keep fit by the other methods. Many people think we should do the exercises, get up early, have a balanced diet and a range of activities at home
instead
 of going to an institution
of
Change preposition
apply
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gym
 or aerobics. If we do it at home it can save money and time. But, we can do it unless we are not patient and determined.
While
,
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apply
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 the tiny group of individuals who do not think about themselves can be hurt if they do it incorrectly.
As a result
, it can be seen that squats are the easiest exercises to do but if you do it wrong, your legs, feet and back can be painful and it certainly makes
our
Correct pronoun usage
your
show examples
health
 and body more weak and sick. In my point of view, paying for
health
 is really essential so we should go to an establishment of fitness to learn about technical and professional exercises that should have a big impact on our lives not
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
have a negative
affect
Correct your spelling
effect
show examples
 just because we do it wrong
due to
 the fact that we learn without the instructions of the teacher.
Thus
, going to the
gym
 is the best way to keep fit correctly and safely
instead
 of doing it by an area of different methods.
Hence
, we should do not only hard activities but
also
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
easy ones with our teachers
due to
 our vulnerable bodies.
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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Physical well-being
  • prime option
  • structured exercise routines
  • professional equipment
  • fostering an environment
  • motivation and discipline
  • counter-argument
  • outdoor activities
  • home workouts
  • cost-effectiveness
  • social and emotional satisfaction
  • team sports
  • hybrid approach
  • holistic approach
  • comprehensive benefits
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