IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Many feel that going to the gym is the best way to stay fit. Others think there are more effective methods. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

#gym #methods
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With the increasing health care cost, more and more people are now hitting a
gym
Use synonyms
 to work out. Budget gyms are popping up in some neighbourhoods to accommodate the growing number of people who want to do their daily
exercise
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as hiking and playing
team
Use synonyms
sports
Use synonyms
 to stay fit and healthy.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss both fitness activities and
further
Linking Words
 explain why in my opinion the latter can produce better results. Undoubtedly, exercising in a
gym
Use synonyms
 can contribute to improving an individual’s physical and psychological health. Performing a daily
exercise
Use synonyms
 routine in the
gym
Use synonyms
 seems beneficial.
Firstly
Linking Words
, a
gym
Use synonyms
 has trainers
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 can guide someone in mapping out perfect routines that ensure customers are performing the
exercise
Use synonyms
 correctly and efficiently to reduce the risk of injury.
Secondly
Linking Words
, fitness centers
equipped
Add a missing verb
are equipped
show examples
 with a wide array of equipment. Posh
gym
Use synonyms
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
 even have saunas, heated pools and steam rooms that can motivate someone to
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
exercise
Use synonyms
 regularly.
In contrast
Linking Words
, some people are trying to get into shape but
hated
Wrong verb form
hate
show examples
 to
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
work out in the
gym
Use synonyms
. They
fell
Correct your spelling
feel
show examples
 that exercising in the room is boring. For
the
Correct determiner usage
this
show examples
 reason, they look for alternative activities that are fun to do like hiking and playing
team
Use synonyms
sports
Use synonyms
. Hikes
in particular
Linking Words
 is a great
legs
Change the noun form
leg
show examples
 workout
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 strengthens body parts
such
Linking Words
 as glutes and calves.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
team
Use synonyms
sports
Use synonyms
 can help you
fell
Correct your spelling
feel
show examples
 fitter, healthier and mentally strong. Playing
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
 can be fun and it will improve someone’s general health and well-being. It
is believe
Change the verb form
is believed
show examples
 that sport is crucial in developing physical skills and can improve
individual’s
Correct article usage
an individual’s
show examples
 self-esteem. In conclusion, a
gym
Use synonyms
exercise
Use synonyms
 allows someone to strengthen and build up a certain part
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 their body.
Linking Words
While exercising
Correct word choice
Exercising
show examples
 outside of the
gym
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as playing
team
Use synonyms
sports
Use synonyms
 offers
long lasting
Add a hyphen
long-lasting
show examples
 benefits that will
last
Linking Words
 even after their golden years. In my opinion, taking up
sports
Use synonyms
 as
fitness
Correct article usage
a fitness
show examples
 routine is more fun and meaningful,
this
Linking Words
exercise
Use synonyms
 could increase the chance of being active in old age than by just doing workouts in the
gym
Use synonyms
.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Physical well-being
  • prime option
  • structured exercise routines
  • professional equipment
  • fostering an environment
  • motivation and discipline
  • counter-argument
  • outdoor activities
  • home workouts
  • cost-effectiveness
  • social and emotional satisfaction
  • team sports
  • hybrid approach
  • holistic approach
  • comprehensive benefits
What to do next:
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