IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Many feel that going to the gym is the best way to stay fit. Others think there are more effective methods Discuss both view and give your own opinion

#gym #methods
It is considered by some
people
 that the best way of
stay
Wrong verb form
staying
show examples
 healthy is
go
Change the verb form
to go
going
show examples
 to
gym
Correct article usage
the gym
show examples
 house. Whilst others disagree and hold a view that there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 a lot of positive
methods
 different
with
Change preposition
from
show examples
 the
gym
 that they can choose.
Although
 there are many
methods
 to choose
, I
Change preposition
from, I
show examples
 agree that travel to the
gym
 will help
we
Correct pronoun usage
us
show examples
 stay healthy. On the one hand, there are many
methods
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
show examples
 be chosen to stay fit,
this
 is true because most
methods
 we use to stay fit nowadays
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 not
or
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
different
with
Change preposition
from
show examples
 the
gym
.
For example
,
go
Wrong verb form
going
show examples
 biking and parking is the most used
methods
 all over the world, when
people
 go parking, they can get more positive heart effect or keep
body
Add an article
the body
show examples
 fit and they do not need to pay for
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
gym
 membership, so there are many positive
methods
people
 can choose to get a healthy body.
On the other hand
, I hold the view that the best way to stay in shape is
visit
Add an article
a visit
show examples
 to the
gym
,
this
 is true because
gym
Add an article
the gym
show examples
 is more professional than public
methods
,
this
 is true because when
people
 purchase
membership
Add an article
a membership
show examples
 from the
gym
, they can visit
gym
Add an article
the gym
show examples
 as a member and stay healthy by using
gym
’s facilities.
As a consequence
, when
people
 have a membership, they can stay
heathy
Correct your spelling
healthy
show examples
 with
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
people
 including
teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
show examples
 who have
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 skills to keep fit and support them
how
Change preposition
in how
show examples
 to use
gym’s
Correct article usage
the gym’s
show examples
 facilities, so
go
Wrong verb form
going
show examples
 to the
gym
 to stay fit is
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
easier than public
methods
. In conclusion, though using public
methods
 will help
people
 stay in shape
due to
 most public
methods
 is free to use, I believe that the best way to keep fit is going to the
gym
due to
gym’s
Correct article usage
the gym’s
show examples
 facilities and
good
Add an article
a good
show examples
 teacher.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Physical well-being
  • prime option
  • structured exercise routines
  • professional equipment
  • fostering an environment
  • motivation and discipline
  • counter-argument
  • outdoor activities
  • home workouts
  • cost-effectiveness
  • social and emotional satisfaction
  • team sports
  • hybrid approach
  • holistic approach
  • comprehensive benefits
What to do next:
Look at other essays: