The graph below shows the percentage of mobile phone owners using various mobile phone features in Vietnam in the year 2005, 2008, 2010.
The table illustrates the proportion of possers of mobile phones using different mobile
phone
features in Vietnam in the years 2005, 2008 and 2010.
Use synonyms
Overall
, it is noticeable that the proportion of people using make calls was the highest , Linking Words
while
Linking Words
the
percentage of take photos was the smallest. Capitalize word
The
Moreover
,the percentage of all types of mobile Linking Words
phone
features decreased, except taking photos.
Use synonyms
Firstly
, the using of make calls had the highest percentage, namely 100%. Linking Words
Moreover
, it maintained the same level in 2005 and 2008. Linking Words
However
, in 2010 it fell to 97% and was the biggest used type of mobile Linking Words
phone
. Use synonyms
Secondly
, the usage of taking photos was 65% , before going up to 70% in 2008.
Linking Words
Furthermore
, it rose moderately to 77% in 2010, but it was the lowest using type of mobile Linking Words
phone
over the period in question.
With regards to sending and receiving text messages, it was approximately 82%, but it dropped to 73 % in 2008 . Use synonyms
Therefore
, it decreased to 5% compared to 2008, roughly 68%. The figure for record studios,accounted for 78%, before decreasing to 75%. Linking Words
However
, it went down to 63% in the final years.Linking Words
Submitted by dimash171206 on
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, moreover".
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words phone with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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