Parents are putting a lot of pressure on their children to succeed. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or negative development?

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In the contemporary competitive landscape, a significant number of parents impose substantial expectations on their children to perform exceptionally well academically, socially, and in their extracurricular pursuits.

This

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essay aims to explore the factors contributing to the trend and elucidate why it constitutes a detrimental development for kids. One of the main drivers behind heightened parental pressure is the aspiration for

their

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next generation to thrive and secure a promising future.

In other words

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, begetters desire their offspring to thrive, viewing success as the key to a better life marked by financial security, opportunities, and social recognition,

thus

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envisioning a more promising future for their child.

For instance

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, one's mom and dad's desire for them to succeed stems from their belief that it will lead to a better life, encompassing financial security, opportunities, and social acknowledgement.

Moreover

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, in numerous cultures, academic and career success is heavily emphasized as a gauge of individual worth and familial reputation, compelling parents to ensure their offspring meet or surpass these cultural standards. Guardians, driven by a mixture of love, concern, and societal influences, push their youngsters to succeed;

however

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, excessive stress can lead to negative effects on their mental health and well-being.

In addition

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, extravagant burden, marked by consistent criticism and unrealistic promises, can undermine their confidence and self-esteem, leaving them feeling inadequate and unworthy.

For example

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, under the weight of their parents' relentless prediction for academic excellence, juveniles battle with feelings of anxiety and self-doubt, constantly fearing failure to meet their standards, which ultimately undermines their confidence and prevents them from finding fulfilment in their accomplishments.

To conclude

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, increased parental squeeze stems from the desire for babies to achieve success and secure a bright future, influenced by societal outlooks, comparisons with peers, and the belief that accomplishments reflect a family's societal standing.

Nonetheless

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this

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pattern has adverse effects, particularly on their mental health and motivation.

gautopsoi368Sun May 26 2024

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task achievement

Your essay does a good job of addressing the task prompt and presenting a balanced view on the issue. However, to improve further, try to include more specific and varied examples that better illustrate your main points. For instance, citing studies or expert opinions could make your argument more compelling.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that all your sentences flow logically from one to the next. While your essay's main ideas are clear, some transitions between sentences and paragraphs could be smoother. Using transitional phrases such as 'in addition,' 'furthermore,' or 'moreover' can help in this regard.

coherence cohesion

You have a strong introduction and conclusion, which effectively set the stage for your argument and wrap up your points. This coherence contributes positively to the overall structure of your essay.

task achievement

Your discussion is well-organized and covers multiple angles of the issue, showing a good understanding of the topic. This helps you comprehensively address the task prompt.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

312 words

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Parents are putting a lot of pressure on their children to succeed. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or negative development?

Your opinion

Everyone should donate a fixed amount of their income to support charity. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

In some countries, there has been an increase in the number of advertisements that try to persuade children to buy snacks, toys, and other goods. Some people claim this is unfair as parents feel under pressure to buy these kinds of things for their children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that the best way to resolve environmental problems is to increase fuel and vehicles’ prices. Do you agree or disagree with the statement?