The graph shows data about the annual earnings of three bakeries in Calgary, 2000-2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.

The graph shows data about the annual earnings of three bakeries in Calgary, 2000-2010.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.
The given graph illustrates the information regarding the yearly
income
of three bakeries from 2000 to 2010.
Overall
the figure indicates the amount of money
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
Amandine
Bakery
and Bolo
bakery
Capitalize word
Bakery
show examples
earned
substantial
Change the word
substantially
show examples
amount of money ( or their
income
increased substantially),
while
the earnings of Mari Bakeshop
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
show examples
considerable
Correct article usage
a considerable
show examples
decline throughout these periods. At
first,
Mari
Bakery
was the most popular
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
to others
while
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it
replaced
Add a missing verb
was replaced
show examples
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
Amandine
Bakery
in 2010. Moving to details, Mari Bakeshop earned approximately $80000 in 2000, showing incremental fluctuation, it made the least amount of money ( just $40000) in 2010. Amandine
Bakery
and Bolo depict an upward trend, starting from $59000 and $20000 respectively in 2000, the former reached the highest
income
in 2010, making more than $
100.000
Correct your spelling
100,000
while
the latter’s revenue was just about $62000. It is worth noting that Amanda
Bakery
passed
steady
Correct article usage
a steady
show examples
trend from 2000 to 2005 and their
income
was slightly less than $60000 in these years
Submitted by diana_ft91 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Vocabulary: Replace the words income, bakery with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "substantial" was used 2 times.
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