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Band 4.5

The chart below show degrees granted in diffrent fields at the national university in the years 1990,2000,and 2010.

The chart below show degrees granted in diffrent fields at the national university in the years 1990,2000,and 2010.
#show #degrees #diffrent #fields #university #years
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The
chart
Use synonyms
 below
show
Change the verb form
shows
show examples
 degrees granted in
diffrent
Correct your spelling
different
 fields at the national university in the years 1990,2000,and 2010. Degrees granted at the national university
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 4 directions,
its
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
computer
Use synonyms
science
Use synonyms
,
medicine
Use synonyms
,
business
Use synonyms
 and
law
Use synonyms
. Given 3 pie charts.
Lets
Replace the word
Let's
Let us
show examples
 start with
computer
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science
Use synonyms
 which was popular in 1990 equally with
business
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. They had identically same
persantage
Correct your spelling
percentage
 in 1990,30 .The remaining 40
persentage
Correct your spelling
per cent
 was split between the two areas,
medicine
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 and
law
Use synonyms
.
Law
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 had the smallest proportion in
this
Linking Words
chart
Use synonyms
,only 15
persantage
Correct your spelling
per cent
.
Medicine
Use synonyms
 25 %.
Early
Change the article
The early
show examples
 noughties had
trend
Add an article
a trend
show examples
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
computer
Use synonyms
science
Use synonyms
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 guess
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because 40 % out of
hundred
Correct article usage
a hundred
show examples
 was his.
Business
Use synonyms
lessen
Change the verb form
lessens
show examples
 for 10 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
Medicine
Use synonyms
grow
Correct subject-verb agreement
grows
show examples
for
Change preposition
by
show examples
 5 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
Meanwhile
Add a comma
,Meanwhile
show examples
 the
law
Use synonyms
,
what
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 was
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
unchosen in 1990,stayed the
sam
Correct your spelling
same
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but fell down for 5
persentage
Correct your spelling
per cent
.Sad.
Finally
Linking Words
,the
last
Linking Words
 pie
chart
Use synonyms
 2010.
Computer
Use synonyms
science
Use synonyms
 still
doesnt
Correct your spelling
doesn't
 give a head start,with 45 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
Business
Use synonyms
,
that
Correct word choice
which
show examples
 in the beginning was on an alike
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
computer
Use synonyms
science
Use synonyms
,
reduce
Wrong verb form
reduced
show examples
for
Change preposition
by
show examples
 15 per
cent
Use synonyms
 relatively from
first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
 pie
chart
Use synonyms
 and 5 per
cent
Use synonyms
 comparably the second one.
Medicine
Use synonyms
 is 25 % same as
Use synonyms
chart
Add an article
a chart
the chart
show examples
 of 1990 and the
Law
Use synonyms
 is 15 per
cent
Use synonyms
 ,
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 as
first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
,too.
Submitted by dnm.best on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words chart, computer, science, medicine, business, law, cent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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