IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Even though doctors all over the world agree that fast food is bad for peoples health, more and more people are eating it. Why are more people eating fast food? What can be done about this problem?

#doctors #world #food #peoples #health #people
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Nowadays,eating fast
food
Use synonyms
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 increasing even though doctors
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
all
the
Change preposition
over the
show examples
worlds
Fix the agreement mistake
world
show examples
advice
Replace the word
advise
show examples
 to avoid it. The main
reasons
Fix the agreement mistake
reason
show examples
 is the individual lifestyle.
However
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 possible solution is changing
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
life routines. In
this
Linking Words
 decade most individuals eating unhealthy meals because of their lifestyle.
In other words
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
spending
Wrong verb form
spend
show examples
 most of their days outside
home
Add an article
the home
a home
show examples
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
.
so
Capitalize word
So
show examples
, fast foods are the easiest and fastest way to eat.
In addition
Linking Words
, when they
back
Add a missing verb
are back
show examples
 home after
long
Correct article usage
a long
show examples
 day
order
Replace the word
ordering
show examples
 meals
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 popular for most
people
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
 of cooking their dishes .
For instance
Linking Words
, the survey done
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2023
done
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
at Sultan Qaboos University showed that 90% of workers
eating
Wrong verb form
eat
show examples
 fast
food
Use synonyms
 daily.
Therefore
Linking Words
, it seems logical that
individuals
Fix the agreement mistake
individual
show examples
 life routine is the main reason for rising the percentage of eating fast
food
Use synonyms
.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
 the other hand, if
people
Use synonyms
aware
Add a missing verb
are aware
show examples
 of the junk meals drawbacks, they will avoid it .
In other words
Linking Words
, awareness is the key to
change
Wrong verb form
changing
show examples
this
Linking Words
 habit and nowadays there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 delicious
heath
Correct your spelling
healthy
show examples
food
Use synonyms
 they just
needs
Change the verb form
need
show examples
 to change their choices.
For example
Linking Words
,
according to
Linking Words
 Oman TV , in some developed countries when
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
awareness
increase
Change the verb form
increases
show examples
 70% of
people
Use synonyms
 turn to healthy routines.
Next,
Linking Words
governments could
also
Linking Words
helped
Change the verb form
help
be helped
show examples
 by forcing citizens to pay fast
food
Use synonyms
tax
Fix the agreement mistake
taxes
show examples
 and if they spend more than one meal on week they are responsible for their cost of healthcare
Thus
Linking Words
,
means
Correct pronoun usage
this means
show examples
this
Linking Words
 issue
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
could be solved or at
less
Replace the word
least
show examples
 decline sharply. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 the junk
food
Use synonyms
 problem
rise
Wrong verb form
is rising
show examples
 because of busy days , turning their lifestyle to
healthier
Correct article usage
a healthier
show examples
 life helps to
reducing
Change the verb form
reduce
show examples
 it and
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 should ask those
how
Correct word choice
who
show examples
 eat junk foods daily to pay tax and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
healthcare is their responsibility .
Moreover
Linking Words
, healthy and fast choices are available
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 days
people
Use synonyms
 need to think
in
Change preposition
about
show examples
 their choices.
Submitted by almqbalimaryam on

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Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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