IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#aim #science #people’s #lives
In contemporary society,
science
 and technology are familiar with their lives.
Hence
, the enhancement of
people
's lives should be a valuable target of
science
. In my view, I strongly agree with the statement. The essay will discuss why agree with the statement.
Firstly
,
due to
 the development of
science
, new technologies are found in the world. These technologies are more helpful to straightforward our complicated
life
 schedule.
For example
, kitchen types of equipment and auto vehicles (driverless vehicles). The
people
 can reduce time waste for cooking purposes. The air fryer, microwave, washing machine etc are the modern technology attached item.
On the other hand
 , auto vehicles. They can be used for disabled
people
.
Also
,
people
 can drive by doing their own work without concern about the driving purpose.
Therefore
, the development of
science
 is caused by the uncomplicated our day-to-day
life
 schedule.
Furthermore
, invented new medicines and vaccines. A healthy
life
 is one of the major requirements of a community.
For instance
, a hundred years ago,
people
 suffered from different kinds of flues and died more. Scientists have discovered solutions by using
science
 and technology.
Moreover
, new inventions are researched and invented items are modified by scientists using modern
science
.
As a result
, in the current society, 98% of
people
 can be cured of whatever they will have diseases. In conclusion, the crucial goal of
science
 should be to upgrade the community's
life
. In my view, I completely agree with
this
 and if
science
 is rejected, humans can not survive in the world. We all have a responsibility to learn and research
science
 invent new things and introduce them to society.
Submitted by shanikamaduri on

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task achievement
Refrain from using personal pronouns in formal essays.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow of ideas and paragraph structure.
lexical resource
Avoid using colloquial language and informal expressions.
grammatical range accuracy
Proofread the essay for grammatical errors and correct them.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • enhancing
  • quality of human life
  • advancements
  • medicine
  • healthcare
  • scientific research
  • solving societal problems
  • improving living standards
  • global issues
  • climate change
  • food scarcity
  • technological advancements
  • limitations
  • negative consequences
  • ethical considerations
  • sustainability
  • environmental preservation
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