Topic: Giving children and adolescents pocket money is common throughout the world. Do the advantages of this action outweigh its disadvantages?

#topic #children #adolescents #pocket #money #world #action

Nowadays, it is very common and popular around the world to give pocket

money

children

and

teenagers

However

, individuals are divided into two groups. The first group believes that there are no drawbacks to giving

money

to your

children

Nevertheless

, the second group reckons that there are some disadvantages and

parents

should not give

money

to their

children

. From my perspective, I do not have a concrete position. So, in

this

essay

Add a comma

,essay

show examples

I will

further

explore

this

thought-provoking issue. On the one hand, it is important to support your

children

and give them some pocket

money

Firstly

parents

are not always near with their

children

As a result

, they cannot purchase some things for their

children

For instance

, the child decides that he wants to drink but he

did

Wrong verb form

does

show examples

not have

money

to buy

bottle

Add an article

a bottle

show examples

of water.

Moreover

, in the teen

years

Add a comma

,years

show examples

it is common for

teenagers

to separate from their

parents

In addition

teenagers

have more interest and want more than

children

For example

, buy new items for their wardrobe or go to the cinema. As a matter of fact, not all

teenagers

work and earn

money

Consequently

parents

have to help financially.

On the other hand

, today

teenagers

and even

children

do not have a healthy lifestyle. They drink alcohol and smoke. Considering

this

, they can spend their pocket

money

on bad things

such

as cigarettes and alcoholic drinks.

Furthermore

, if

teenagers

get a lot of

money

they can lose the understanding of the value of

this

money

Thus

, they will not have any motivation to work hard because they will understand that they will have

money

anyways

Correct your spelling

anyway

show examples

. In conclusion, there are some crucial disadvantages which can lead to bad consequences.

In contrast

, if it is possible to get over all drawbacks , there will be only the benefits that remain.

Submitted by slobodanatol83 on Fri Sep 08 2023

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16Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

304 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic: Giving children and adolescents pocket money is common throughout the world. Do the advantages of this action outweigh its disadvantages?

Do the advantages of government spending their money on college and university fees for student outweigh the disadvantage?

Some people say History is one of most important school subjects other people think that, in today world,subject like science and technology are more important than History. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

More and more people are becoming seriously overweight. Some people suggest that the solution to this problem is to increase the price of fattening foods. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that money spent on space research benefits all humanity. Others take the opposite view and say that money for this type of research is wasted. Discuss these 2 opinions / positions.