In today’s world of advanced science and technology, we still greatly value our artists such as musicians, painters and writers. What can the arts tell us about life that science and technology cannot? Give the reason?

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In the globalization era, the advent of technology and scientific

help

Correct subject-verb agreement

helps

show examples

us many higher quality of life.

However

, some debates think that there are a large group of

people

who admire

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

art

While

I personally believe that

arts

have two main factors which

Wrong verb form

are

show examples

able to cope with the problems in our daily life. There are many reasons why artists like musicians, painters and writers remain still at large even in

this

tech-savvy world.

Firstly

, masterpieces of

art

have an enormous influence on

people

’s interests. The reason is that not only does the artworks inspire human with emotional effects after admiring them, but they

also

can heal the heart of depressed

people

For example

, there are many pictures

such

as The Starry Night, and Sunflowers by the well-known artist Van Gogh, which circulate these days and bring plenty of inspiration for younger generations about the stories of the

art

. At the same time, making

arts

Fix the agreement mistake

art

show examples

would help

people

who have

mental-illness

Correct your spelling

mental illness

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manage their

feeling

Fix the agreement mistake

feelings

show examples

and it

also

helps them to express themselves without having to use words.

Therefore

, the museum always has the action to protect the

art

in order to pass it on to future descendants.

Furthermore

people

can find pleasure in a good work of

art

Art

assists individuals in connecting with others who love

art

like them and expanding their world to

people

around them through music or painting. The reason is that in our age, there are quantities of individuals who have to face isolation and cannot connect with

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society.

Thus

, through drawing or writing in

arts

people

could rebuild their relationships and get in touch with

people

around which

support

Correct subject-verb agreement

supports

show examples

everyone to increase

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

social interaction. In conclusion,

although

human

Fix the agreement mistake

humans

show examples

invented plenty of machines to

tacke

Correct your spelling

take

tackle

difficult

Replace the word

difficulties

show examples

in our daily

question

Fix the agreement mistake

questions

show examples

, not all of them can provide

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

smart

solution

Fix the agreement mistake

solutions

show examples

in terms of human emotional problems. After all,

arts

may be the key

support

Wrong verb form

to supporting

show examples

people on

Change preposition

people's

show examples

emotional health which can provide

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

creativy

Correct your spelling

creativity

creative

, motivation and inspiration.

Submitted by alex.vu031002 on Sat Sep 09 2023

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task response

The essay addresses the topic, but it lacks depth and clear organization. The main points are not clearly developed, and the examples provided need more elaboration to support the arguments effectively.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are present, but they lack clarity and coherence. The essay lacks clear logical progression and fails to effectively link ideas within and between paragraphs.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

334 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In today’s world of advanced science and technology, we still greatly value our artists such as musicians, painters and writers. What can the arts tell us about life that science and technology cannot? Give the reason?

Your opinion

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweight the disadvantages?

Many employees may work at home with modern technology. Some people claim that it benefits only the workers, but not the employers. Do you agree or disagree?

Television dominates the free-time of too many people. It can make people lazy and prevent them from socializing with others. Do you agree or disagree?

6) Some businesses find that their new employees lack basic interpersonal skills such as cooperative skills. What are the causes? Suggest possible solutions.