Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

In today's age, learning a second language is necessary for the modern education system. Some specialists think that the best period for the young to learn a new one is at primary rather than in high school. I totally agree that
this
opinion has more benefits than drawbacks.
To begin
with, there are some disadvantages of studying a foreign vocabulary
since
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from
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the beginning of education. The first reason is that the youngsters will become tired if learning words takes a lot of time and they don’t have enough time for their hobbies and their friends which may lead to the loss of social skills and relationships.
As a result
, any extra class should be in balance with personal life.
For example
, it can be enough to have just a few lessons a week, so that pupils still have some time for themselves.
On the other hand
, the advantages of
this
situation outweigh the disadvantages.
Initially
, it is believed that children have exceptional abilities for learning new things and they can remember different good information since childhood is a period when it is easy to get used to many new things and create the habit of learning non-native languages from an early age.
Secondly
, learning a new way to communicate with other people will improve memory and cognitive functions.
Moreover
, kids can use these benefits to watch cartoons, listen to music or read books in other languages,
consequently
, it increases children’s access to world knowledge. In conclusion, learning
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
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foreign words at an early age has both pros and cons. It can help the children
to
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develop their skills and strengthen their interaction but
also
put
Wrong verb form
puts
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pressure on them.
However
, I believe that the advantages of
this
will bring many chances for the kids to complete themself.
Submitted by quynhtranhbh on

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coherence cohesion
Your introduction clearly sets the stage for the discussion, and you have included both an introduction and a conclusion, which is commendable. However, the conclusion could be fortified by summarizing the key points more effectively to provide a stronger final impression.
coherence cohesion
While the essay follows a logical structure, transitions between ideas could be smoother. Use cohesive devices more effectively to lead the reader from one idea to another seamlessly.
coherence cohesion
You've appropriately supported some of your main points with explanations, but the essay would benefit from more detailed, relevant examples. Specific examples help to illustrate your points and make your argument more convincing.
task achievement
You have addressed the task and presented a clear position throughout the essay. To further improve, ensure your ideas are fully developed and that each paragraph contributes to your overall position. Providing more specific examples and analysis would strengthen the response.
task achievement
Your ideas are relevant to the task, but strive to delve deeper into the topic. Offering more elaboration and exploration of the ideas presented would enhance clarity and comprehension.
task achievement
Your use of examples is adequate, but to achieve a higher band score, ensure examples are not only relevant but also specific and detailed to solidly support the points being made.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cognitive abilities
  • pronunciation
  • self-conscious
  • cultural awareness
  • global society
  • proficiency levels
  • competitive job market
  • foundational skills
  • qualified teachers
  • recreational activities
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