IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart below shows the different types of accommodation chosen by the British when they went on holiday in 2010.

The bar chart below shows the different types of accommodation chosen by the British when they went on holiday in 2010.
#bar #accommodation #british #holiday
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The chart gives the information about
varities
Correct your spelling
variety
 of
accommodation
Fix the agreement mistake
accommodations
show examples
 opted
by
Change preposition
for by
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 the British on holiday trips in the year 2010.
Unit
Correct article usage
The unit
show examples
 of measurement is Percentage.
Overall
Linking Words
,
highest
Add an article
the highest
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 proportion of
people
Use synonyms
 chose
hotel
Fix the agreement mistake
hotels
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in all the four regions and in England and
Whales
Correct your spelling
Wales
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,
Caravan
Use synonyms
 had the least proportion
whereas
Linking Words
 in Scotland and
Nothern
Correct your spelling
Northern
show examples
 Ireland
Correct article usage
the
show examples
lowest percentage of preference was camping. Looking into the details, hotel
stay
Fix the agreement mistake
stays
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 were nearly half the number in England and Scotland and around 40
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
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 in Whales and
North
Correct article usage
the North
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 side of Ireland.
Firstly
Linking Words
, In England, only 5% of
people
Use synonyms
 used
Use synonyms
caravan
Add an article
the caravan
a caravan
show examples
 as their
accomodation
Correct your spelling
accommodation
 and around 10% enjoyed camping. In a similar trend, only
few
Change the article
a few
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people
Use synonyms
 in
scotland
Change the capitalization
Scotland
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 stayed in
Caravan
Use synonyms
 and Camping.
However
Linking Words
,
Caravan
Use synonyms
 stay was the second highest
accomodation
Correct your spelling
accommodation
 in Northern Ireland.
Finally
Linking Words
, In
Whales
Add a comma
,Whales
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 approximately 10% of humans had their stay in
Use synonyms
Caravan
Correct article usage
a Caravan
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 and Camping which is 40%
lesser
Correct word choice
less
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 than the figure of the
people
Use synonyms
 who took
rest
Correct article usage
a rest
show examples
 in
hotel
Correct article usage
a hotel
show examples
 .
Submitted by kavitha7797 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, caravan with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stay" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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