Modern technology is now very common in most workplaces. How do you think has changed the way we worked? Do you think there are disadvantages to relying too much on technology?

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These days, it can be noted that most employers use modern inventions to run their businesses. In my opinion, by using the latest

technology

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companies

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can do their work effectively, but when they rely on it too much, it can lead to a number of problems. Undoubtedly, using modern

technology

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will not only enhance employees’ performance but

also

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the company’s income.

In other words

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companies

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that use AI programs are able to finish their tasks within a short time.

This

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is because they can generate more ideas easily compared to traditional methods in the past where they had to have a long discussion.

For instance

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, marketing

companies

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can come up with effective marketing strategies and ideas which can clearly help

companies

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to improve their sales.

Thus

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, with

this

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, employees will have an easy working environment,

while

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companies

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will gain more profits. The second advantage here by using modern

technology

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restaurants and shops are able to give their services to customers when they are at home.

Moreover

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companies

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that had improved their system before covid 19 faced it perfectly.

For example

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, Pizza Hut delivers their food for the consumer without any visiting needs, and

that is

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just by one click in their own application.

As a result

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, if restaurants and shops improved their service, they could earn high profits just by using the new

technology

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Finally

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, in the near future, people think

companies

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will replace workers by relying on AI technologies, and that will cause many economic issues for citizens.

Furthermore

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, if they lose their jobs, they will not cover their needs and expenses which leads to starvation. Because of that governments must control

this

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development before damaging the future. To clarify my points in 2021 when Elon Musk had bought Twitter, he fired more than 65% of his employees because he could handle the whole of

this

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International company without them by just relying on AI

technology

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Consequently

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, people around the world have experienced what Elon Musk did, and they have started to think cautiously about

this

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development which can risk their careers. In conclusion, technologies are essential for growing

companies

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' systems and services which are helpful for the customers to serve them without doing any little effort.

However

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, it

also

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has negative effects and may determine humanity's future.

Submitted by s_syedy on Mon Sep 11 2023

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Vocabulary & Sentence Structure

To further improve, consider varying sentence structures and employing a wider range of vocabulary to articulate points more vividly. This can add depth to your essay.

Balanced Argumentation

When discussing disadvantages or potential negative outcomes, balance your argument by suggesting possible solutions or measures. This approach can showcase critical thinking and a comprehensive understanding of the topic.

Conclusion Enhancement

In your conclusion, try to succinctly restate the main points before stating your final opinion. This technique helps reinforce your arguments and provides a strong finish to your essay.

Use of Examples

You effectively used relevant examples to support your points, such as the mention of Pizza Hut and Elon Musk’s decisions. This adds credibility and strength to your arguments.

Balanced Discussion

Your essay presents a balanced view by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of technology in the workplace. This indicates a thorough understanding of the topic.

Coherence & Cohesion

The logical flow of your essay, aided by clear paragraphing and the use of linking words, makes your arguments easy to follow and understand. Good coherence and cohesion are evident throughout your text.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

379 words

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Modern technology is now very common in most workplaces. How do you think has changed the way we worked? Do you think there are disadvantages to relying too much on technology?

Childhood obesity has become a serious problem in recent years. What are the primary causes of this? What measures should be taken to reduce childhood obesity?

Many countries spend large amounts of money on world sporting events such as the Olympic Games and football World Cup. Instead these monies can be spent on encouraging young children to take up sports at a young age. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later, and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

ChatGPT Some people believe that in order to reduce the rising obesity among children the school administration should make it necessary for every child to participate in sports and other outdoor activities.