IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The pie charts below show reasons why people left the UK for other countries and why people stayed in the UK. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The pie charts below show reasons why people left the UK for other countries and why people stayed in the UK. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#minutes #show #people #uk #countries #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The provided pie charts show the reasons why
people
Use synonyms
 leave and stay in the
UK
Use synonyms
. There are five reasons which are joining a family/friends, the language, the employment, financial reasons and the life quality.
To begin
Linking Words
 with , the stands for all causes in the two charts do not have a huge difference.
For example
Linking Words
, 39% of citizens stay in the
UK
Use synonyms
 because of joining a family or friends.
In contrast
Linking Words
, 34% of crowds who left the
UK
Use synonyms
 resulted from the same reason.
Moreover
Linking Words
, language and employment are the second and third factors in both staying and leaving pies and the statistics are pretty similar.
People
Use synonyms
 who have difficulties speaking English contribute to 24% of the left group and about 20% of
people
Use synonyms
 move out because of relocation and unemployment.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, employment and language compose 25% and 19% of
people
Use synonyms
 who stay in the
UK
Use synonyms
.
Finally
Linking Words
, to pursue a better life quality, 9% of
people
Use synonyms
 choose to leave, but 5% of
people
Use synonyms
 choose to stay to enjoy the lifestyle in the
UK
Use synonyms
. Meanwhile, the financial environment attracts 17% of
people
Use synonyms
 to not move.
However
Linking Words
, 10% of
people
Use synonyms
 insist on moving in order to relieve their financial burden.
Submitted by xiaol8616 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, uk with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "move" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stay" was used 4 times.
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