IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The pie charts below show reasons why people left the UK for other countries and why people stayed in the UK. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The pie charts below show reasons why people left the UK for other countries and why people stayed in the UK. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#minutes #show #people #uk #countries #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The provided pie charts show the reasons why
people
 leave and stay in the
UK
. There are five reasons which are joining a family/friends, the language, the employment, financial reasons and the life quality.
To begin
 with , the stands for all causes in the two charts do not have a huge difference.
For example
, 39% of citizens stay in the
UK
 because of joining a family or friends.
In contrast
, 34% of crowds who left the
UK
 resulted from the same reason.
Moreover
, language and employment are the second and third factors in both staying and leaving pies and the statistics are pretty similar.
People
 who have difficulties speaking English contribute to 24% of the left group and about 20% of
people
 move out because of relocation and unemployment.
On the other hand
, employment and language compose 25% and 19% of
people
 who stay in the
UK
.
Finally
, to pursue a better life quality, 9% of
people
 choose to leave, but 5% of
people
 choose to stay to enjoy the lifestyle in the
UK
. Meanwhile, the financial environment attracts 17% of
people
 to not move.
However
, 10% of
people
 insist on moving in order to relieve their financial burden.
Submitted by xiaol8616 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, uk with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "move" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "stay" was used 4 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: