Fewer young people play sports these days. why is this? What can be done to encourage more young people to do sports.
It is undeniable that nowadays, younger generations have less interest in sports activities for numerous reasons.
However
, to overcome this
issue society play an important role as well and the government should also
take necessary measure to encourage them. In the forthcoming paragraph, we will discuss some reasons with some relevant solutions.
To begin
with, the first and foremost reason for this
issue is the competitive era as most of our teenagers are running in the same race to find better career opportunities to create a good source of income. Due to
this
, most of them have no time to play some daily sports such
as basketball or cycling. For instance
, a study in 2021 shows that forty per cent of the younger population remains unemployed every year because of huge competition in different fields like information technology.
However
, to mitigate this
issue, the community plays an important role as parents and mentors could provide them with a piece of proper knowledge and guide them in their sport
activities because they have years of experience. Change the noun form
sports
Besides
, the community could arrange some sort of competition where all adolescents could participate and win some attractive cash rewards.
Apart from
this
, the government could also
run some campaigns to promote the benefits of sport in our daily lives. Additionally
, authorities can start unemployment allowance schemes so that teenagers can get more time to find suitable jobs and have less pressure on them.
To conclude
, however
, it is true that because of huge competition and directionless commands are the major causes of this
problem, but by taking some measurable initiative from the government and society can better this
situation.Submitted by kulwinder250897 on
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task response
The task response is partially achieved. The essay addresses the question, but the response is not fully developed and lacks depth. It would benefit from more specific examples and a more comprehensive analysis of the reasons why younger people are not participating in sports.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and cohesion are adequate. The essay has some logical structure and presents some relevant supporting points. However, the introduction and conclusion could be more clearly presented, and better transitions between ideas would improve the essay's overall coherence.
lexical resource
The lexical resource is sufficient. The essay demonstrates a moderate range of vocabulary, but some terms are repetitive and lack precision. Utilizing a wider variety of vocabulary and structures would enhance the lexical resource.
grammatical range
The grammatical range is moderate. The essay utilizes a mix of simple and complex sentences, but there are frequent errors in sentence structure and verb tense. A more varied and accurate use of grammar would enhance the grammatical range of the essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.