There is a lot of pressure on young people today to succeed academically. As a result, some people believe that non-academic subjects, such as physical education and cookery, should be removed from the school syllabus so that children can concentrate on academic work. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

#pressure #people #subjects #education #cookery #school #syllabus #children #work

It is undeniable that education is definitely essential for people. Nowadays, young generations feel

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amount of pressure to be successful academically.

As a consequence

, others admit that non-academic subjects must be removed from the school's syllabus.

Therefore

, younger can focus on their academics. In my perspective, I highly disagree that non-academic lessons should be deleted by schools since they have a bunch of positive aspects to be considered.

This

essay will dive deeply into the topic in order to provide some points related to the topic

as well as

examples. First and foremost, non-academic subjects can emphasise

students

' creativity and mood. They will be resourceful to create something

as a result

of learning the lessons. To elucidate

further

, a cookery lesson can be a favourite for female

students

due to

improving their cooking skills. They will try to make a portion of delicious food with a new recipe.

Moreover

, in terms of sports, male

students

are super excited when there is a sports schedule in their school timetables. It will boost their mood;

as a result

, they keep learning after the end of the sports session.

Secondly

students

get pressured into learning because they do not have suitable strategies to address their learning issues.

In addition

, they feel stressed when there are a number of goals which should be achieved by them. They will set their standards, or how to gain that achievement. In my opinion, when the results are beyond their expectations, pressure, stress, and other negative feelings will appear in their minds.

For example

, when facing national exams, younger choose to focus on learning to get higher scores. When they have a problem

while

studying, they get distracted or pressured and immediately blame something which is actually not relevant to their study. In conclusion, I believe that non-academic subjects are crucial for pupils as extracurricular activities or additional lessons at schools. Pressure does not go to

this

subject.

Nevertheless

, it appears when

students

get stressed about learning.

Submitted by misstiasclassroom on Wed Sep 13 2023

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

330 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

pressure
succeed
academically
non-academic
physical education
cookery
school syllabus
concentrate
academic work
well-rounded
enhancement
practical skills
balanced education system

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