IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some young people go to college or university to have a successful career path. Others, however, chose to go straight to work to gain real life experience after high school. Discuss both views and write your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Some people nowadays prefer to look for a job after high
school
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 rather than finishing a
degree
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, and eventually applying for a job. In my essay, I will provide information regarding the risks and consequences of the two pathways. In the present time, more jobs are asking for a
college
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degree
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 as a primary requirement to be entertained for an interview.
Furthermore
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, the qualifications they seek continue to increase.
For instance
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, if I work as a human resource conducting an interview with people applying for a cashier position, I will prefer an applicant with a
college
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degree
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 rather than a high
school
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 graduate
due to
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 the documents presented that they are able to perform the task.
On the other hand
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, the other applicant might be suitable
Rephrase
apply
show examples
also
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, but he does not have enough papers to prove his capabilities. Meanwhile, as the qualifications for professional jobs rise, having a
college
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degree
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also
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 gets tougher to reach for the reason that matriculation is
also
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 high.
Therefore
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, some students are forced to stop and look for a job that would not need a
college
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degree
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. There is still a lot of work that one can have even if they do not finish their
degree
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 but salaries might not be as competitive as if they finished
school
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. Many believe that hardship and perseverance even with little education is the key to being successful. In conclusion, I can see that there are some people who have a better life despite not having a
college
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degree
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,
however
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, in my ,opinion education is the foundation of a person. Everything that you are now, can be learned in
school
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 these includes values and strategies in order to achieve goals. It might be difficult to finish a
degree
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 but once you finish it no one can take it from you and you will always be one step ahead of others.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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