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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Nowadays, more and more university students choose to study abroad. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#university #students #study
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These days, most
of
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apply
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the
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apply
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university
students
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 are often seen choosing abroad
for
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apply
show examples
the
study
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. I believe that
the
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apply
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pursuing
degree
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a degree
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in
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apply
show examples
abroad
have
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has
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 more advantages than disadvantages.
This
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 essay shall discuss the pros and later highlight
cons
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the cons
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 before concluding with my opinions.
To begin
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 with, There are
plethora
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a plethora
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 of
the
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apply
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benefits
of
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to
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 studying
in
Rephrase
apply
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abroad.
This
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to
Add a missing verb
is to
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 say that
,
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apply
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 when
a
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apply
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graduate
students
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 choose to
study
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 in any foreign destination
then
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 they can have opportunities to explore
new
Add an article
the new
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 educational system and experience it.
Moreover
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, the brilliant educational system will assist them
to grab
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in grabbing
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 their desired career paths. To illustrate,
according to
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 the New
york times
Correct your spelling
York Times
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, it has mentioned that,
students
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 who have graduated from
abroad
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apply
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educational
institutionals
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institutions
 have 60% more secure
job
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jobs
show examples
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then
Replace the word
than
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 others.
Furthermore
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, pursuing
further
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 education
in
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apply
show examples
abroad can help the individual to experience the work culture which they can learn and utilize in their own
country
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 for the betterment of their nation.
On the other hand
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, with many of the
merits
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,merits
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 there
also
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comes
Verb problem
apply
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come
demerits
Correct article usage
the demerits
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 of the
students
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 going
for
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apply
show examples
abroad to
study
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. When
students
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 go to
study
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 in
foreign
Add an article
a foreign
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 land,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
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carries
Correct subject-verb agreement
carry
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out
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apply
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huge amount of tuition fees from the
country
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 which can hamper
economy
Correct article usage
the economy
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 of the
country
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.
Likewise
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, tremendous numbers of
the
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apply
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student are settling
in
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apply
show examples
the
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apply
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abroad after completing their studies which have
direct
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a direct
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 effect
in
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on
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 the development of the
country
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 as the youths lack in the nation.
To sum up
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, I
completly
Correct your spelling
completely
 believe that
the
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apply
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pursuing
futher
Correct your spelling
further
 education
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
abroad is beneficial as it provides
oppurtunities
Correct your spelling
opportunities
 to explore and experience the different
environment
Fix the agreement mistake
environments
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 of the
country
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by gurungshreejana13 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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