IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think the media – television and films – negatively affect people’s behaviour. Others do not think so. How do you think the media affects people’s behavior? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

#people #media #television #films #people’s #behaviour #behavior #support
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It goes without saying, that television and films influence our behaviour. Many people even say that it actually leads to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
negative thoughts, conclusions and actions. To make a long story short,
such
Linking Words
 an opinion is
disputive
Correct your spelling
disputed
dispute
. On the one hand we may be affected by some advertisement, vivid scene in a movie or some bad news. We start to see things from another point of view and it may catch our attention and thoughts for
the
Correct article usage
a
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 few hours, rarely days. We even may recall
this
Linking Words
 fact in
a
Correct article usage
the
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 middle of doing something, not related. Sometimes we need to discuss our feelings and
conserns
Correct your spelling
concerns
 with a friend or relative to hear their opinion. Alternatively,
such
Linking Words
experience
Correct article usage
an experience
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 may change someone's mood for a short period of time and I believe it cannot
make
Verb problem
have
show examples
really
Add an article
a really
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 negative impact on
person's
Correct article usage
a person's
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 life or character. If an individual owns
chritical
Correct your spelling
critical
 thinking and
wise
Add a missing verb
is wise
show examples
,
media
Correct article usage
the media
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 cannot make things upside down. As an example, I want to provide the day when I watched some cruel
scene
Fix the agreement mistake
scenes
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 in the film. It
definetily
Correct your spelling
definitely
 touched my feelings,
moreover
Linking Words
 I felt bad and insecure, but it only means
movie's
Correct article usage
the movie's
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 creators did a good job
to catch
Change preposition
of catching
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 me. As time flies, I
forgot
Wrong verb form
forget
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 what I saw yesterday or
last
Linking Words
 week and come back to my usual lifestyle.
To conclude
Linking Words
, in my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
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 everything around us may influence our future decisions and actions not only television, so even a small talk or event changes something inside us. But we cannot say for sure
Correct your spelling
whether
wheather
Correct your spelling
whether
 it was
negative
Add an article
a negative
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 or positive experience
Submitted by helgavitalivna on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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