IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #situation #shortage #money #situations
As it is said try and try until you get success. But it is important for
person
Add an article
a person
the person
show examples
 to accept
situation
Add an article
the situation
show examples
. In my own opinion, both
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 equally important
accepting
Change preposition
to accepting
show examples
as well as
try
Wrong verb form
trying
show examples
 to improve.
Firstly
, It is good for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people to accept
bad
Add an article
the bad
show examples
 situation because that help
him
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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or
her
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 to keep
herself
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
 happy. If a man will accept reality
then
 it be
easily
Change the word
easy
show examples
 for him to live.
For example
, if a man is facing
problem
Correct article usage
a problem
show examples
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
money
then
 he should accept the problem because it
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
 a
person
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
become
postive
Correct your spelling
positive
.
Thus
, it is better for a woman to accept
things
 easily and as fast as
posible
Correct your spelling
possible
. Accepting
things
give
Verb problem
has
show examples
Correct article usage
a postive
show examples
postive
Correct your spelling
positive
 impact on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people.
Secondly
, It is said that a
person
 should try to improve
things
as well as
 keep herself updated. If a
person
will keep
Wrong verb form
keeps
show examples
 herself improving and updated
then
 it will be easy for her to
get
Verb problem
apply
show examples
success
Replace the word
succeed
show examples
. Trying new
things
 is part of life.
For instance
, if a
person
 is facing
diffecutly
Correct your spelling
difficulty
 in getting
promotion
Correct article usage
a promotion
show examples
then
 by trying and improve he or she can
get
Verb problem
apply
show examples
improve easily and fast. A
person
 should wait for good
things
 to help because good
things
 take time.
Thirdly
,
Hence
, a
person
 should keep trying
things
.
However
,
as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
old people should support
as well as
 encourage
young
Correct article usage
the young
show examples
 to keep
updating
Wrong verb form
updated
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life.
To conclude
, accepting
situation
Add an article
the situation
show examples
 is
also
 good but
keep
Verb problem
apply
show examples
trying and improving is
also
better
Correct article usage
a better
show examples
chocie
Correct your spelling
choice
. In my own opinion, it is better to try and improve situations.
Submitted by purvaam383 on

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