The first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Australian household. The second chart shows the greenhouse gas emissions which result from this energy use.

#first #energy #australian #household #second #greenhouse #gas #emissions

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The given pie charts depict the average number of

energy

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used by

Australian

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households and the greenhouse gas emissions resulting from

energy

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use

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Overall

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, heating made up as the biggest contributor to

energy

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use

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while

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water heating constitutes the greenhouse gas emissions biggest proportion among

Australian

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households. Starting with the first pie chart explains the data on

Australian

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households using

energy

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. Heating was in the first position of contributor at 42%, followed by Water heating at third-tenths. The proportion of other appliances stood as the third contributor to

energy

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use

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at 15%.

Then

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, refrigeration and lighting contribute 7% and 4%, respectively.

In addition

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, cooling only contributes a tiny fraction. Moving on to the second pie chart, water heating stood as the biggest proportion of greenhouse gas emissions at 32%.

Moreover

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, other appliances contribute roughly a quarter.

Next,

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heating and refrigeration constitute similar percentages at 15% and 14%, respectively.

Additionally

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, lighting made up 8%,

while

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cooling same as the

Australian

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households’

energy

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use

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contributing only 3%.

Submitted by zakiyaartanti19 on Mon Sep 18 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

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Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, australian, use with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "stood" was used 2 times.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

165 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Energy consumption
Greenhouse gas emissions
Sustainable practices
Energy efficiency
Renewable energy
Fossil fuels
Carbon footprint
Eco-friendly appliances
Insulation
Solar panels
Recycling
Climate change
Kilowatt-hour (kWh)
Emissions-intensive
Energy audit
Smart meters

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The first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Australian household. The second chart shows the greenhouse gas emissions which result from this energy use.

These days, in many countries, fewer and fewer people want to become teachers, particularly in secondary schools. What are the reasons for this, and how could the problem be solved?

It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and going university. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

Some people think that the parents of children who commit crimes should also receive a punishment

Some people think that with the increasing use of mobile phones and computers, people lose the ability to communicate face to face. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?