The graph below compares the number of visits to two new music sites on the web. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below. »

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The line graph provides information regarding how many people use two music websites for a specific

number

Use synonyms

days

Use synonyms

Overall

Linking Words

, the

number

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of visitors to both websites showed a wide variety of changes over the considered time period.

To begin

Linking Words

with,

Change preposition

show examples

the Music Choice website, the initial

day

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figure was about 120

thousand

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. The

number

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stayed constant for 3

days

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However

Linking Words

, people who visited

this

Linking Words

website reduced to a greater extent to reach around 30

thousand

Use synonyms

in 7

days

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. Moving

further

Linking Words

, after 9

days

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, there was a steep increase in the

number

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of visitors to the channel. For the next few

days

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, the graph showed a subsequent increment and decrement and

finally

Linking Words

, on the 15th

day

Use synonyms

count

Add an article

the count

show examples

was 170

thousand

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, which constitutes the maximum

number

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of visitors in the entire time period considered. It is evident that, in the Pop Parade site, only 40

thousand

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visited on

day

Use synonyms

1. From

then

Linking Words

, the value of the

number

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of humans using the website increased and decreased

subsequently

Linking Words

till 11

days

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Although

Linking Words

the figure always stayed below the other channel’s

number

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, it exceeded on two

days

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Finally

Linking Words

, the

last

Linking Words

day

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in the considered period was

having

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

approximately 70

thousand

Use synonyms

people.

kavitha7797Tue Sep 19 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "finally".

▼

Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Vocabulary: Replace the words number, days, day, thousand with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 5 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "stayed" was used 2 times.

▼

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

198 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Music sites
Web traffic
Number of visits
Trend analysis
Initial phase
Steady increase
Fluctuations
Significant change
Peaks
Turning point
Growth rate
Seasonal variation
Comparative analysis
Long-term trend

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The graph below compares the number of visits to two new music sites on the web. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below. »

some people think that employers should not care about the way their employees dress, because what matters is the quality of their work. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many different countries have the same shops and products. Some think that it is a positive development, whereas others consider it as negative. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that the computer and the Internet are important in children's studies, but others think that students can learn more effectively in schools and with teachers. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.