IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Some people think that environmental problems should be solved on a global scale while others believe it is better to deal with them nationally. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #scale
Nowadays, the environment is a serious problem for the survival of the Earth - the place where humans live.
Also
Add a comma
,Also
show examples
 there are a few opinions that say that
problems
 need to
process
Wrong verb form
be processed
show examples
 in the global area and others think that it should be divided to solve for each specific national area.
However
, I believe that environmental
problems
 should be discussed
by
Change preposition
at
show examples
 both national and global levels to lead to the best solutions. First of all, from the global level, it plays a crucial role in solving environmental issues. Some
discussion
Fix the agreement mistake
discussions
show examples
 will be organized by
UN
Correct article usage
the UN
show examples
 or or some global organizations with the participation of many different
countries
, it converses about work that affects the environment or changes the atmosphere
such
 as
greenhouse
Correct article usage
the greenhouse
show examples
 effect or the discharge of radioactive water that has been treated by Japan.
Therefore
, the organization will make the right decision to propagate and solve
that
Correct pronoun usage
those
show examples
problems
 and all
countries
 who are present in that meeting need to follow. It will create a big wave for people around the world, thereby attracting more
countries
 to participate.
On the other hand
, the global regime will not be able to completely solve the problem if each country
also
 introduces new policies to contribute to reducing environmental pollution. They have their own advantages that can
use
Wrong verb form
be used
show examples
 to protect the medium, for all developing
countries
 and developed
countries
. From there, small remaining
problems
 can be resolved and they can arrange flexible hours depending on their time zone. In conclusion, I believe that both global and national levels need to combine to achieve the best results for
protect
Change the verb form
protecting
show examples
 the environment.
Submitted by anhnguhongmai on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • international cooperation
  • sovereign rights
  • Paris Agreement
  • climate change
  • ocean pollution
  • collective measures
  • economic interests
  • political will
  • enforcement issues
  • free-riders
  • tailor-made solutions
  • transboundary pollution
  • resource constraints
  • global frameworks
  • national efforts
What to do next:
Look at other essays: