IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

It is better to buy just a few expensive clothes, rather than lots of cheapers clothes. Do you agree or disagree?

#clothes #lots #cheapers
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, all over the world, the topic of buying
clothes
Use synonyms
 is omnipresent.
While
Linking Words
 some
people
Use synonyms
 think the
advantages
Use synonyms
 of buying a few expensive
clothes
Use synonyms
 exist, other
people
Use synonyms
 think there are
advantages
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 buying a lot of cheaper
clothes
Use synonyms
. From my point of view, I disagree with
this
Linking Words
 perspective for the reasons discussed below. On the one hand, as far as buying few expensive
clothes
Use synonyms
 is concerned,
firstly
Linking Words
, to a large extent, especially in modern times, no matter where in the world you live, you can look fancy
due to
Linking Words
 the
fact
Use synonyms
 that you bought expensive
clothes
Use synonyms
 resulting in having a good
clothes
Use synonyms
’ shapes with nice colours.
In addition
Linking Words
, at least to some degree, you can save the planet in reason of the
fact
Use synonyms
 that you do not
overconsummate
Correct your spelling
over consummate
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are
advantages
Use synonyms
 of buying a lot of cheaper
clothes
Use synonyms
, first and foremost, by and large, when you buy cheaper
clothes
Use synonyms
, you can spend money
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 other projects in order to
buying
Change the verb
buy
show examples
 reasonably, leading to being less exigent with the fashion trend.
Secondly
Linking Words
, and most importantly for me, you can have a variety of
clothes
Use synonyms
 owing to the
fact
Use synonyms
 that you wearing many different items, resulting in having your own style.
For example
Linking Words
, some
people
Use synonyms
 arrive at the party and have the same expensive dress as another guest in the room,
due to
Linking Words
 the
fact
Use synonyms
 that you have many
clothes
Use synonyms
, you can compose and match with your own style, resulting in being unique. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
 some
people
Use synonyms
 think that buying a few expensive
clothes
Use synonyms
 has many
advantages
Use synonyms
, other
people
Use synonyms
 say there are
advantages
Use synonyms
 to buying a lot of
cheaper
Correct word choice
cheap
show examples
clothes
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, In my opinion, to some extent, I disagree with these perspectives for the above-mentioned reasons.
Submitted by tony.vantroo on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: