IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Government should spend money on railways rather than roads, To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement ?

#government #money #railways #roads
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In the present time, some
people
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 argue that the
government
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 should construct more
roads
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 for individuals to access other places easily,
while
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 others say that the
government
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 should invest their budget in
railways
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instead
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. I fully agree that the
government
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 should allocate their budget to construct
railways
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 rather than
roads
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. One of the main reasons why
railways
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 have significant benefits for the country’s citizens is that
railways
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 could improve our health. If the
government
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 spend money to construct
railways
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instead
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 of
roads
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, the number of
cars
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 on the
roads
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 will be reduced. These days, we face lots of pollution which is produced by
cars
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. It has been generating a negative impact on our health. Some
people
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 get sick from huge amounts of carbon dioxide which are emitted by
cars
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. Another reason is the
railways
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 could promote city congestion. When the country has more
railways
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,
people
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 can easily access other places
such
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 as their workplaces, universities and shopping malls.
Therefore
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, they don’t need to live in the city in order to work, study and shopping. They could live in urban areas
instead
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 and use public transportation which
lead
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leads
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 to the problem of population density can be alleviated. In conclusion, I believe that
government
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 investing in
railways
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 would benefit individuals more than constructing
roads
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. The health problems of
people
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 in the country will be improved by less pollution produced by
cars
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 and city congestion could be released. Our quality of life will be improved and
people
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 will become happier than they used to be.
Submitted by nattaporn.vibha on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • sustainability
  • environmental footprint
  • efficiency
  • pollution
  • cost-effectiveness
  • economic development
  • accessibility
  • public transportation
  • congestion
  • air pollution
  • initial investment
  • maintenance
  • upgrades
  • rural
  • urban
  • last-mile connectivity
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