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Band 6.5

Nowadays, not enough students choose science subjects at university in many countries. Why is this? What effects does this have on society?

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In modern days, a small number of pupils in a large number of states choose to study
science
Use synonyms
 objects at universities. The reason is the perceived difficulties and lack of interest for learners.
However
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, consequences might be more serious and contribute to Environmental Consequences and economic impact. Nowadays,
science
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 objects, e.g. math, chemistry and physics seem hard achievable and misunderstandable for many adolescents in schools. More teenagers are facing difficulties in
science
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 objects and giving up after a short period.
In addition
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, the research provided by the National Britain University of Psychology claims that the interests of children depend on geography.
For example
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, students in Western countries,
such
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 as the United Kingdom or the United States prefer to study modern professions, specifically artists, musicians or film actors. Researchers claimed that the reason is in high demand and provides financial opportunities for scientists in China,
while
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 the opposite situation is observed in the USA for actors.
Furthermore
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, low-based
science
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 knowledge leads to lower economic increase and Environmental Consequences.
For instance
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, the level of GDP in the main country of America is decreasing year by year and losing leading potential in the world, because children now are more worried about gender identification than the question of world development.
Secondly
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, lack of education enhances the level of environmental issues and may lead to climate change.
Otherwise
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, when fewer and fewer students are choosing
science
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, including environmental sciences, there is a shortage of experts who are able to recognize and find solutions to environmental problems.
Also
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, health levels in the areas will get worse, by the reason of the impossible living conditions.
To conclude
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, the quantity of young scholars is decreasing from decade to decade and might have irreparable results.

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coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are not clearly presented. It is important to clearly state the main argument and provide a summary of the main points in the conclusion.
task achievement
The main points are supported with relevant examples and arguments. However, more specific examples could be provided to strengthen the arguments.
coherence cohesion
The essay demonstrates a moderate level of coherence and cohesion. Some improvements can be made to ensure a clearer logical structure and smoother transitions between paragraphs.
lexical resource
The essay includes a range of vocabulary and the ideas are generally well-expressed. However, there are some instances of unclear or awkward phrasing that could be improved.
grammatical range
The essay has some grammatical errors and inconsistencies. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement, tense consistency, and word order.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • deter
  • promotion
  • opportunities
  • role models
  • lucrative
  • employment
  • gender stereotypes
  • societal norms
  • access to information
  • technological stagnation
  • shortage
  • skilled professionals
  • innovation
  • healthcare sector
  • workforce
  • global competitiveness
  • advancements
  • economic growth
  • public health services
  • environmental sciences
  • combat climate change
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