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Band 3.5

People believe that these days there is a general increase in anti-social behavior and lack of respect for other. 1.What might have caused this? 2. How to improve this?

#people #behavior #lack #respect
It is the idea among
the
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apply
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men and women that there is a
gradual
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gradually
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 growing trend
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 unacceptable social activities and loosing of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
obedience in
people
.
This
 is mainly
due to
 the extensive
drug
 addiction and the detachment from religious practices by the
people
 in the society, which could be controlled and eliminated by the active intervention of the government through imposed rules and regulations.
Initially
Add a comma
,Initially
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 the causative effect of illegal consumables
have
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has
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 led
the
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apply
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people
 to develop unnecessary problems with
the
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apply
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others leading to harassment, abuse, kidnapping, bribery, corruption, conspiracy and so on.
Also
 when
people
 are not focused on religious beliefs, faiths and observances they used to have, it can
could
Verb problem
be
show examples
 disrespectful
society
Change preposition
to society
show examples
.
For example
,
drug
 addiction
have
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has
show examples
 become one of the main reason for the increased divorce rates in the world where respect in
the
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apply
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married life
also
 has suffered a lot. As a solution for
this
 matter,
stricting
Correct your spelling
restricting
 the controls applied by the government on
drug
 trafficking and promoting
the
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apply
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involvement in religious activities during childhood are tedious. When these rules,
policies
Correct word choice
and policies
show examples
 are
inacted
Correct your spelling
enacted
, they should be reviewed and amended
accordingly
 and those who do not follow them to be severely punished. To sum it up,
the
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drug
 trafficking and
the
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apply
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less attention to rituals, norms and beliefs have led to anti-social
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
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 and
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
 of respect for
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
 which could be rectified only through the active involvement of
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
.
Submitted by tnirmani94 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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