The chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities.

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities.
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The bar graph illustrates the regular consumption and buying of
coffee
Use synonyms
and tea by Australian residents from five different
cities
Use synonyms
in the
last
Linking Words
4 weeks.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is obvious that the highest rate for going to
cafes
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to drink
coffee
Use synonyms
or tea was for Melbourne and Hobart citizens
Rephrase
apply
show examples
similarly
Linking Words
.
Additionally
Linking Words
, it has been reported from all these
cities
Use synonyms
that instant
coffee
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was the first chosen drink among residents of these
cities
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. Regarding going to
cafes
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, more than 60% of the population of Melbourne, Hobart, and Sydney went to
cafes
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in the
last
Linking Words
4 weeks.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
while
Linking Words
over a half of Brisban citizens went to
cafes
Use synonyms
in the
last
Linking Words
4 weeks, in Adelaide only less than a half did the same. Focusing on the consumption of
coffee
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, around 53% bought fresh and less than two-fifths bought instant
coffee
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in Hobart,
while
Linking Words
less than 52% of other
cities
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in Australia chose to buy fresh
coffee
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.
In addition
Linking Words
, the gap between buying instant
coffee
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
of its alternative in Adelaide and Brisban was huge with nearly 14% and 15% respectively.
Submitted by mahanmxd on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last, while".
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words coffee, cities, cafes with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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